When You are Sick Does Anyone Care?

Health issues tend to affect your motherhood role periodically and not everyone in your home is always understanding.  When this happens, you have to think of ways that can bring you the most peace in your situation.  Too often mothers think that it isn't okay to be selfish sometimes (notice I didn't say all the time).  But being selfish has its place and when you feel like your mind, body, or spirit is being challenged beyond belief, you owe it to yourself to stay in that bed a little longer, call off work, cancel the family invite, leave the home, drop the kids off with a sitter, or sit in a corner and do nothing.

There will be the arguments, silent treatment and vengeful tactics used against you when involved with those who have long been selfish before you came along.  They may have grown accustomed to you meeting their every request without objection.  However, times change and things happen in motherhood that we don't always know or understand why.  We can't always control what Mother Nature is going to do.  Consider yourself blessed when you are in a relationship with someone who often does nice things for you.  Some men know how to care for their women.  They bring them food when they are ill, help them out of their beds, buy them needed items, and speak kindly to them.  They are affectionate and will sometimes put their partner's needs above their own.  They are compassionate when wives or girlfriends are mentally or physically challenged.

We live in a world where people aren't always nice, polite, or caring.  When this happens, we have to rely on self.  You know what you can tolerate more than anyone else and it is up to you to speak up about your issues without sparing feelings.  You know how you feel from one day to the next.  You know if this is one of your "go off" days.  It would make sense to want to be left alone.  If you ask for space and don't get it, demand it--take it! 

I think of the many women who have had to move far away in order to find peace from annoying relatives, nonchalant spouses,  controlling exes, demanding children, and more.  They grew weary of being sick and tired of so-called loved ones, they just wanted to be in control of their own lives without someone telling them to do just one more thing or asking them for yet another thing.  These deceased women just wanted to hold an understanding hand. 

Rest in peace moms who never truly got the love and peace you yearned for--may you get what you were looking for in this world on the other side.

Nicholl McGuire