Sunday

Upset with Lazy Partner, Children - Listen to Audio by Blog Owner


Check this out on Chirbit

See tips here on site when it comes to getting lazy family members to cooperate and help with chores.



Saturday

Feeling Loved and Accepted - Suicidal Thoughts - lonely, depressed

Tips on Keeping Your Hair Tip Top Shape - Don't Stress About Hair Mother!

Curly hair can become a feather in your cup, if you take care of it correctly. Learn how to maintain the beauty of your curls with these tips.


Tip#1 Don't fight nature.

A head full of beautiful and bouncy curls is something that many women dream of. You should appreciate your hair and do everything to enhance its beauty, rather than fighting nature.


Tip#2 Wash less.

The more you wash, the higher the risk of dryness due to a lack of natural oils. Shampoo your curls 2-3 times a week to keep them clean and hydrated.


Tip#3 Condition more.

Conditioner is an important part of one's curly hair care routine that should never be ignored. Every time you use a conditioner, you provide your locks with necessary moisture and nourishment.



Tip #4 Blow-dry correctly

If you have a difuser, it’s time to take it out of the box and learn how to use it.  Difuser is vital because it enables you to dry bigger sections of hair due to a wider airflow.  Visit us here http://gilferrersalon.com/

Thursday

Demanding, Manipulative Matriarchs - Sooner or Later Mother Will Reap

Reflecting back on childhood memories can be quite painful. No one really understands just how much it hurts to see a mother you love go to great measures to try to be everything to everyone, good, bad or otherwise. Sometimes she goes above and beyond for others, but for her children not so much. Of course, troubled mothers have their reasons for treating their children wrongly sometimes, “My kids are unappreciative…They don’t come around…They don’t like me” while never bothering to check her self as to why that is. There are no perfect people and some mothers and children fail to truly realize this about one another.  From cooking to advising others, demanding mom may be a kind-hearted and seemingly sweet soul sometimes, but then there are those moments—the ones that leave children ashamed, spouses angry, and others secretly wishing never to be in her presence again.  Before judging those who feel this way, know that individuals, who have been repeatedly driven mad when it comes to their mothers’ issues, have their reasons why they choose to safeguard their hearts. It doesn’t make their emotions right or wrong, they just are.

Until there is healing within and around them, it will be a difficult and long journey to love one’s toxic mother or mother figure now or ever. If a troubled Mom wasn’t pretending to like this person and that one, she had those she genuinely favored and oftentimes it wasn’t her own child. There was something odd, mysterious even scary about a Mom like that. Sitting back with a smirk on her face, she seemed to have taken great pleasure in someone else’s suffering, she may have said something like, “You reap what you sow. You should’ve listened to me…serves you right. Always listen to your mother. Mother knows best. God don’t like ugly. Don’t come crying to me!” Disappoint her enough times and she just might start bragging about others to you or comparing what they have to what you don’t have.

For some readers who are African Americans, you might have experienced “the attitude” or the “I know you didn’t” kind of stare from Mama. She warned you about acting like Ms. Nice Nasty a time or two and how “You are not too old to get your a** beat!” Ms. Nice Nasty was just another personality of a sassy mother who projected her woes onto her children. These women could be nice one minute and nasty the other. She accused others of her own bad behavior and then punished daughters and sons for it; rather than straightening her personal issues with self out, she felt she had to check others. It was Ms. Nasty’s attitude that some of you worked hard to avoid. If she asked or demanded you do something, you did it or else experience the consequences. Like a child, some of you are still fearful of Mama’s dark side coming out. It was her evil twin. Some of you may have called her, “The devil, a witch, evil, crazy…”

Mom didn’t like her life much. She had experienced much hardship and had never really been treated for mental instabilities.So where would her unresolved issues go? They usually fall on the children. Who was going to experience her wrath once triggered by a wrong look, an annoying sound, and angry outburst? Most often it was the little girl or boy looking back at her. A son or daughter was at times frightened and never quite matured around her for fear the bad woman might come out. They were then told to, “Grow up…Stop acting like a baby…Don’t make me hurt you…What are you looking at?” Mother was well on her way to training children to fear her not love her.

Excerpt from Tell Me Mother You're Sorry

Nicholl McGuire

James Foley's mother: U.S. response to my son's kidnapping "a travesty"



The mother of U.S. journalist James Foley, who was kidnapped and later killed in Syria, criticizes the U.S. government's response. Diane Foley says her ordeal was appalling and made worse by U.S. officials who "know they let us down."

Tuesday

Work at Home Mothers - A Cry for those Ripped Off by Companies Promising Incentives Using Referral Links

For years I have shared referral links of various companies' products and services on and offline with stay-at-home mothers, retirees, unemployed, disabled, and students.  I will be the first to admit that I had to follow up, sometimes even get firm with some professionals and business owners who either didn't track referrals like they claimed they would, flat out didn't want to pay incentives, or some other reason as to why monies didn't come for me.

Now let's face it, not everyone we recommend via referral link will buy or join a club and that's okay, but when you notice zero clickthroughs and you know for certain a family member or friend at least visited the site, if nothing else, there is something wrong.  This was a clue for me and I immediately contacted customer support and asked them to check my account, the link, etc.

I think if more of us would check our links, follow up rather than give up, especially when suddenly both traffic and money has stopped coming in, we could put a stop to some of these companies ripping us and others off!  Some of us put in hours sharing links, talking about links, referencing links, and creating tracking links of the links, that to be unfairly treated or for a company to misrepresent what they can do for us, is wrong!  And I challenge you work at home mothers to do something about it today!  Leave comments on sites like mine, create videos about shady companies, alert the people who promote for these companies on places like YouTube, and more.

The minute you notice something is fishy with some of these businesses who specifically target us and others, call them out!  If they don't want to make wrongs right, then visit the Better Business Bureau about their deceptive marketing and also alert people who visit RipOff Report, Yelp and other consumer review sites.



I am disappointed and fed up with companies taking advantage of us mothers.  They know full well what they are doing when they can clearly see we are driving traffic to their sites and many of them are reaping profits, yet they don't acknowledge or reward us for our hard work.  To date, I am reviewing all affiliate sites I have partnered with and if my links are not active and I don't see rewards, I will be spreading the word about them.  I already have some assistants on standby that are more than happy to use social media to make a point--we will not be taken for granted just because we work from home for any number of reasons and need money a bit more than those who work outside of the home.

So I encourage all of you who market other people's products and services on and offline and you noticed for months (or even years) you haven't been able to make a sell despite all of the efforts and instructions from gurus you have been given, and your referral links were working, but now they are not.  Be very suspicious.  Some companies might be changing any number of website related upgrades--wouldn't it make sense for them to alert you about that?  Others may not be doing anything, but deactivating referral links or redirecting them to official pages and then reaping the benefits. 

Around the web, some of the best sellers suddenly found that they had problems cashing out, links didn't work, and more.  Reporters need to investigate and learn more about these kinds of profit rip-offs via the Internet that have been going on for decades!  Don't be na├»ve.  Personally, I have been working online on and off since 2000, so you can only imagine the things I have seen and been through online.

Nicholl McGuire

Saturday

Asking Saves Kids - For the Love of God Talk to Your Kids

One question could save your child

Join Nicholl on Chirbit - share audio

When I don't have the patience or time to write, I share my thoughts on Chirbit.  A simple way to get some thoughts off your mind.  Stop by the site browse the available audio.  Find something you like and just click.  Listen while you work or surf using any device.  Feel free to connect with me to receive the latest audio messages.  I am not only an author, wife and mother, but I encourage others online and offline.  Stay blessed!  Click Chirbit.

Nicholl McGuire


Nicholl with four sons in CA, 2015.

Friday

"A Slave Mother's Cry" Written By Rev. Timothy Flemming JR. & SR. - Remember the Slave Mother



One of the worst cries comes from a mother whose child has been kidnapped, taken without cause or died.  God have mercy!  It all is so painful, it stirs your spirit, when used correctly, pain makes you want to do more with your life, help others, do what's right!  Much of the motivation for blacks of the past to fight for change started with a slave mother's cry.  Know that truth!  If you have lost a child in any kind of way, redirect your pain and don't allow the enemy to win!  Stay true to your calling.  There will be brighter days whether in this life or the next one!  God bless. -- Nicholl McGuire 

Thursday

The Ache in My Belly for My Grandmother and Others Who are Spiritual Moms

There is just something special about those wise, older moms who know how to pray and show those around them (no matter the skin tone, gender, sexuality, etc.) some love.  I miss my grandma.

I miss her because...

She was there to answer the phone during those times when my kids were getting on my last nerve.

She heard my cries even when I didn't call her and so she would pick up the phone and call me, "Are you okay?  Tell me about it."

She would remind me to take out the Bible and read a verse sometimes for her, other times for me.

She shared stories not only of her successes, but failures too.

She wasn't always happy and she didn't fake her emotions either or act as if she was better than me just because she was older and wiser.

She loved me even when I didn't love myself, God, and wasn't much on showing her love either.

She was genuinely happy when I achieved something and didn't mind listening to my stories.

She told me things and said, "This is just between me and you."  I felt special even if everyone else knew the same thing.

She didn't mind explaining how she whipped a meal or dessert together and sometimes mentioned her "secrets."

She laughed when I told her funny things and didn't act self-righteous.

I miss my Grandma.  I guess that is why it's hard sometimes writing my motherhood stuff on this blog now.  Feel free to check out When Mothers Cry and Tell Me Mother You're Sorry.

Nicholl McGuire


Wednesday

Your Husband, Boyfriend Won't Give You What Daddy Didn't

Seeking genuine love, affection, appreciation and more from a spouse or live-in companion can be self-defeating when he or she is unwilling or doesn't know how to do these things.  People just can't give you what they don't have nor can they satisfy innate desires especially when you have a history of "Daddy Issues."  Daddy didn't love mother and children, Daddy was too busy, Daddy had better things to do, Daddy was often frustrated and angry with us, Daddy had mental illness, Daddy's parents didn't love or care for him...and so all this stuff gets dumped on us somehow some way and we are encouraged to deal with it, "That's just how your father is." 

In my nonfiction book, Say Goodbye to Dad, written for those women and men who feel fatherless, and are seeking a deeper understanding as to how to break free from toxic emotional ties with their fathers, these topics and more are discussed.  I share some personal experiences, but the majority of the guide is directed toward presenting the struggles and finding the solace through the painful memories.

Life is simply too short to go about it wishing/hoping/praying for something that a partner, a father or a substitute just can't provide you, Mother.  The emotionally and physically draining one-sided relationship does impact you down to your very soul and then spills over onto children and grandchildren.  In Say Goodbye to Dad not only do I provide you with trusted research into various difficult personalities, but I expose the wounds and share tips on how to get on the fast track toward healing and come out of trials with a smile on your face!  There are enough issues one has to face in his or her own family let alone having to deal with Daddy related stuff as well when you don't have to or want to.

It is a damn good feeling to finally be free from fear, worry, and other toxic parental programming brought on by self and dysfunctional kinfolk--trust me, I have done it!  I want my readers to feel empowered, have courage and know that everything isn't going to fall apart because you are protecting yourself and your children from further emotional upset and other things connected to a dysfunctional father. 

You can parent better when you experience peace and no longer pain from the past.  You can also be a good partner to someone who loves you much or you can free yourself from a bad relationship decision as a result of a toxic tie to Dad. 

So check out a free sample of my nonfiction book, Say Goodbye to Dad  (use coupon code BP69U for a limited time only).  Now if your father isn't the issue, but your mother is a burden, then check out Tell Me Mother You're Sorry (use coupon code NK75A for a limited time only) that encourages self-awareness solutions on dealing with mother manipulation.

Nicholl McGuire, When Mothers Cry Blog Owner

Tuesday

In Relationship with Controlling Person - Breakup, Divorce

In Relationship with Controlling Person via @sutros  This is an eye-opening message especially for those mothers contemplating divorce.  Watch as well as pray.  Always think ahead!

Tuesday

The Pushback from Children, The Push to Get It Done or Else

If we said it once, said it twice, three times or more, yet our children still don't hear, forgot, or don't know what on earth we are talking about.  These moments are what makes us wish at times we could drive the children to the nearest store and ask for a refund.  "What do you mean you didn't hear me?  What are you talking about, that is not what I said!  Did you forget, I have been on this planet for how many years...I think I know when someone isn't telling the truth!"  So they push back with their smart comments, deep sighs, stomps, eye rolls, muttering under their breath, door slamming, throwing toys, fall outs onto the floor, yelling, or whatever else they think will do the trick to work your last nerve.  But tough moms don't give up!  We stand our ground come hell or high water and if dad wants to know what is going on, we respond, "You can deal with them."  The joys of parenting. -- Nicholl McGuire 


Tuesday

Grandparents Competing Over Grandchildren: What to Do?

Enlightened but Not Crazy - When Talking to Partner About Bad News Concerning Children

You didn't anticipate that some unflattering news about your children was going to lead to a full blown argument with their father, but depending on the kind of person he is, it most always will.  Prideful, self-absorbed fathers don't want to hear anything that might make them look bad.  This is why many dads are quick t shut out conversation about their unruly offspring.

You are made aware of some things about your child or children you don't like, but as a mother your job is to handle all issues whether father is around or not.  You want details about your child, who was there, what happened, and more.  After obtaining as much as you can about a situation, you are interviewing people like a reporter.  You separate truth from fiction and now you are ready to provide your partner with your findings.

Now some fathers could care less about negative events since they are not proactive in their children's lives and others are over-the-top almost sounding like they are punishing you for not doing what they feel was a good enough job. 

Critical partners will say many negative things to the point that you feel like you are going crazy!  However, you are not.  Sometimes fake concern from an ineffective Dad or crazy concern from a demanding father can push not only children, but you too over the edge.  Yet, you know full well you did what you could to remedy a situation between your children and others.

Always keep in mind that it is indeed a battle being a good mother when a partner is not doing his or her part.  It can be a struggle parenting children in a poor relationship, but press on anyway!  Even if that one you created or adopted a child with never shows any appreciation for all that you do concerning your children, just remember your son(s) and daughter(s) will one day thank you!


Nicholl McGuire has been through the fire but came out like the three Hebrew boys.  Stay strong Mom, the best is still yet to come!  Check out another blog by this blogger Everything You Need to Know About Parents, Babies and Children 
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About Me

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Over 20 years office work experience, six years completed college coursework, background in print media and communications, recognized for exceptional attendance and received merit increase for past job performance, self-published author and part-time entrepreneur, Internet marketing and social media experience. Interned for non-profit organization, women's group and community service business. Additional experience: teaching/training others, customer service and sales. Learn more at Nicholl McGuire and Nicholl McGuire Media

When Mothers Cry Blog Archive