Respecting the Unrespectable Husband

Dealing with a stingy, controlling husband

Angry with an Abusive Partner, a Child Suffers

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Angry with Partner, a Child Suffers: A father didn't anticipate having a child with a woman he once loved, but now considers crazy.  A mother cried many tears for failing t...

Some Men wanting their Partners to Act like their Mothers

When Mothers Cry About Leaving Their Partner

It's happening everywhere! Mothers are not interested in playing mom or wife. They want out! There is simply too much pressure to be everything to everybody! But it doesn't have to end with mom running out the door carrying a box or two in hand with car keys and plans to drive away and never look back! Something can be done! Something must be done!

If it ain't broke don't fix it.

In relationships we tend to look for things wrong when there isn't really anything of major importance wrong. But watching the soap operas, listening to your friend's drama, playing some sad oldies, and thinking way too deeply about something you have read, will surely make you think things that just aren't true. When you are feeling insecure, creating dramas that are imagined, and scaring your partner away with all your questions, its time to change your habits and hobbies -- how about stop feeding into everyone else's drama?

What you don't know won't hurt you.

Is it really necessary to know everything that is going on with your partner at work, with his relatives and friends, and wherever else his feet tread? Let's just say he does have a history of cheating. If you suspect he is still up to no good, why worry yourself any longer? Do what you must to break free. But if he isn't, then you need help sister! There are things that men will do that will make their wife or girlfriend frown, but if you don't want to be upset on a daily basis, stop snooping, stop asking and just be sure you aren't doing anything to make him distrust you!

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again!

So you argued with your partner and some other things too embarrassing to breathe to anyone you know occurred. Can you honestly say that it is time to call it quits? People make mistakes all the time. People say things they don't mean. These things are normal, but what isn't is being beaten, stabbed, punished verbally or physically over and over again -- these things are usually unforgivable for most normal people. However, those little things, the ones that you know you need to work on trying to do better, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again!

When you and your partner both know its simply not feasible to break up emotionally and/or financially, and when you both know that the timing doesn't look or feel right, stick it out! Be as polite as you can, make love as much as you can, and try real hard to smile when you rather frown. Don't give up over petty things. Do talk about what makes you angry and if you need a third party, then find someone for yourself that may help you before you suggest going to counseling together!

May God bless...

Nicholl McGuire is the creator of this blog and author of When Mothers Cry, Amazon.com You can follow her tweets at @nichollmcguire.

About Foolish Partners

You may have been in a relationship with one of those foolish types (hopefully in the past and not in the present LOL.) Anyway, he is the type who supposedly knows more than you, makes more money and thinks that he can do what he wants when he wants without repercussions.

I was once in a relationship with not just one, but a few men like this. They think that because you are not the top earner in the household, you have no say so on how the household is run and how money should be spent.

A mother cries periodically on the outside after a heated argument, but cries often on the inside vowing that when she gets on her feet again, she will leave him in the dust.

What makes these men act so foolishly especially with money? Is it because they are trying to keep up with friends or is it far more deeper than that? Do they convince themselves that they can handle all the holes they have dug themselves into such as: "I will pay my friend back. I will invest one day. I will have enough money for a rainy day..." only to be ill-prepared when life throws these foolish men curve balls.

As women and mothers we must not lose the fight when we see our household is spiraling downward, we can no longer allow ourselves to trust that the men will do the right thing for family when they have proven over and over again that they don't care nor see the future as we see it. If it means that some of us have to get a job or two, remove ourselves from the home front with children in tote, get a babysitter, or make some investments privately then by all means, do it!

I use to discourage women and mothers from putting money aside secretly, but for many of you that is just what you will have to do, because as long as he knows everything you make, he will look to you to solve his foolish mistakes.

I know some women who actually share bank accounts with men who have repeatedly withdrawn money out of the shared account (without consulting with her) and left them not only with an empty gas tank, but overdraft fees. "It was the rent money!" She screams. "Don't worry about it! I'll pay it, I promise!" The foolish man says. The day comes and he is short of cash. Now the family has to suddenly move. The downtrodden mother brings her problem man with her and the cycle continues.

Take a stand if not for yourself women who are with foolish partners, but for your innocent children too! They shouldn't have to worry over not having milk for their cereal, shoes for their feet, and money for their lunches.

May 2010 be a year that some mothers and women will rid themselves of toxic partners!
Nicholl McGuire

Behind Every Successful Husband...

When I surf the Internet I see many successful entrepreneurs who are primarily male. I also see alot of men writing about women's interests too. So I gathered from seeing these things that behind every one of those men who brag about what they know and how much money they make that there is a wife, girlfriend or ex somewhere in the mix watching the children, cleaning the house, cooking, and working outside the home (and in many cases making more money than he!)

I will be the first to admit that I am not always following biblical principles and I do covet the life of a man on occassion. He usually has enough time in his day to do the things he loves whether it is to perform well at his job (stay late, travel, go to nice restaurants, entertain important people, etc.) However, when you are a mother who spends the majority of time with your children, you don't have the kind of time to be a five star performer, you are lucky that you don't burn the toast because you are trying to multi-task.

Mothers fight for their time. But fathers, most anyway, don't do much fighting, they just turn on the television, hang out around the watercooler on weekdays after 5 p.m. (when they should be thinking about getting home to help his wife), and leave out the home to shop uninterrupted while mom is in the other room tending to the children.

So when these family men boast about all their wonderful accomplishments, I know that behind that successful man is a mother who allowed him the free time to achieve his dreams. I can only hope that he can step out of the limelight long enough to help her with the children, so that she too can be equally successful. However, there is a price to pay for those so-called family men who don't know how to pull away from the computer, leave their jobs at a decent hour, and communicate where they are going for long hours at a time. Putting aside her motherhood role, a woman will get tired of being taken for granted and if a tear shall fall from her eye in the midst of her frustration with her man, she will eventually talk about leaving, if she hasn't already, to pursue her own dreams -- its only a matter of time.

Mothers appreciate a good man when you have him and train the one whose bad. (Training doesn't always mean living with him or talking into the wee hours of the morning either.)

Be blessed.

Nicholl McGuire
http://parentsbabieschildren.blogspot.com