The Enemy's Plan for School Break

School is Almost Out - Don't Be Pushed Into Doing Everything The Kids Want this Summer

Can you believe it?  Funny how time flies.  The children made it through another year and you did too, Mom. Good job!  You didn't do the unthinkable after a teacher said or did something that rubbed you the wrong way.  You didn't go up to the school and hurt that little boy or girl who gave your child misery.  You didn't go off on another parent over stealing a parking space...Congrats Moms everywhere for passing those life tests that grate your nerves.

Now for some of you new moms, it won't be long before you will be shuttling your child off to school.  Are they ready for Kindergarten yet?  If not, start doing the things to get them ready.  So what is on the agenda for the summer?  In a previous blog entry, I spoke about this topic.  But have you Moms made plans yet?

One thing I noticed with each school break was my children's need for not just more stuff (sigh), but they also wanted some downtime that wasn't scheduled with activities (outdoor trips) and nothing was required of them (chores).  With older children, you have to keep this in mind.  No child takes too kindly for long when their days are often dominated by adults. "Hey get ready we are going to...By the way don't forget to do...You really ought to....or else!"

Be sure to have what I called in the past on this blog, "Do nothing time" for the children.  It is a moment in the day where there is nothing but peace and quiet--they do nothing and so do you.  This can happen on weekends if you are a working mom.  They can lie down, sit down, or stare out the window, but the time is meant for life's activity to slow down.  You can play soft music or a slow show to help wind them down.

As much as sons and daughters push us to want to go here and there, buy this, and do that every time they have a school break, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the word, "No...not today.  Mom needs a time-out.  I don't have the money for that...no time for this."  The children might rant, throw things around, etc. due to your resistance, but SO WHAT! Yep, so what.  You can take some things they already have too.  One summer I took my children to the police station, told them ugly stories about some of their relatives who when they were young caused problems and the consequences they received...the anger outbursts were rare and then eventually "do nothing time" was appreciated especially after workbook, flashcard and educational games on the Internet time.  They were wore out--lol.

Mom, don't be bullied into filling every day up with stuff to do for "I'm so bored" children just because they are out of school.  Consider this the debt isn't worth it and before long they will be out the door forgetting about a lot of the stuff you did anyway until they have children of their own--lol.

Nicholl McGuire blog owner and mother of four sons (soon to be young adult, teenager, tween, and almost tween.)

Another blog worth checking out I manage, enjoy! http://parentsbabieschildren.blogspot.com

Prepare for the Next School Break Now

One of the bravest things a mother can do for herself and her child is know when to let go and just do it!  It doesn't matter the child's age, when things are getting out of control and you feel as a mother that you can't do much more for your child, pick up the phone!  Some moms probably did just that this last break.  In the near future, other moms will end up not doing too much to get some assistance because they falsely believe they can do everything on their own.  This is why we see or hear of children being abused or worse dying in the care of moms.  If you have a newborn or toddler and you are feeling a bit frustrated or at your wits end, start looking for resources that offer child care.  There are programs out there that are discounted and even free for a time.  But you don't know if you don't look.  Check with human services department in your city, churches, mother support groups, and online ads related to childcare programs or home daycare.

Spring breaks (or any school breaks) can be grueling.  Your money, time, and patience is only going to go so far before you look at the calendar and say, "Thank God, back to school."  So before the next break, put an action plan together for yourself and the children.  Know what you are going to do when things get rough again at home.  The following is a list to help plan for the next break which is the longest of them all, summer break (sigh).

1.  Save money for activities.  Start now signing them up for stuff if you haven't already.

2.  Find out what events are happening in other neighborhoods where your relatives live and make plans with them to take your children to them during the summer.  This way you have some relief.

3.  List family freebies and discounted days at restaurants and elsewhere.  Note them on your personal calendar.  This way you don't have to cook on those days.

4.  Check in with friends and find out what their plans are for their children this summer.

5.  Plan what you will do when children are unable to go outside.  Do you have some fun things for them?  Rotate toys and don't allow them to see and play with everything all at once.  This way when you pull the fun stuff out of storage it will be like Christmas time for them this summer. 

6.  Talk with tweens and teens about household chores and work.  There are sites online that pay children 13 years and up so start searching.  Schedule days for them to work.  Check with relatives who are in need of help and talk with them about paying the children for tasks.  This way you can relieve some stress on your wallet.

7.  Share concerns with your Creator, a person of faith who can pray for you or a counselor.  When you are able to communicate family matters with someone, you are better able to deal with children.  Also, they don't feel so much tension emanating from you.

Nicholl McGuire
When Mothers Cry Author

Summer Break with the Kiddos Gettin' to You Yet?

Oh the joy of summer!  Kids staying up late and sleeping in (sometimes).  "What are we going to do today?  Are we going to Toys R Us?  I want to go to the movies...Do you think we can go to...?"  Those requests to do everything that costs money (sigh).


The other day I looked at my sons, they grew again.  The pjs on one child was like Michael Jackson's skinny pants in the 80s.  The elder child's head seemed to get bigger along with his vocabulary.  He's 8 years old with an idea and a plan to crowdsource one of his projects.  Why do I get the feeling that his business will surpass mine by leaps and bounds when he gets started?  I think I might be working for him soon.


With long school breaks, a parent has to acquire more patience, strategies on keeping children busy (if you can't drop them off at a daycare or with relatives).  Funny, I bumped into one of the childcare specialists at the library who watched my children last year while I worked outside the home.  She was happy to see us and gave me a couple tips on getting them off to a good start this summer.  I was ready to pass them on to her like a track runner slapping a baton into his teammate's hand that day.  Instead, I smiled and told her, "Thanks for the tips."


So far we have summer weekdays that are made up of the following: time to eat, time to eat again, time to do chores, time to play, time to be quiet, time to go out and run, time to learn something new, time to go here and there, time to take care of business, time to eat again, time to eat again, time to...well you get the point.  I almost forgot, there are some things that I do to make life a little less stressful with the children.  They are as follows:


1.  No picking up the phone when I'm already busy with them and everything else.  I really don't like having to keep others entertained when I have much to do.  They can hear the stress in my voice, and for a few folks, they take that sort of thing personal.  Texting is okay, but I am careful with that too.  Sometimes the messages can come across like you are angry or something.  So if I know my children are not engrossed in something, I don't pick up the phone.  Also, I put me first during those tough times if you know what I mean. Kids don't have a clue what ladies' issues consist of, so some stuff they want to do is put on hold until I can get myself together.  "Hey kids you know women have some problems and sometimes they have to sit down, so go play quietly and if you do good we might do something on another day."  They have a look of concern and then they are gone--they know better.


2.  I have little patience for cooking large meals and I don't like going into the kitchen as often as they eat.  So I trained the 7 and 8 year old to get some snacks in between meals without my assistance. (FYI - Hide your knives.  You will also need to instruct them on what it is forbidden to touch.  I still watch them moving around in the kitchen even when they think I'm not looking).


3.  All computers and mobile devices are monitored with family safety tools.  So I don't have to stand over them like a drill sergeant.


4.  Television is limited to a certain time period.  FYI - check for the timer feature that will shut it off.  (Note: you can do the same using Internet safety products i.e.) Microsoft Family Safety.


5.  Take those kids out so that they can run around.  A wide open space is a blessing even if it doesn't have any playground equipment.


6.  Put a limit on children playing in the same room together.  They get tired of one another.  So if they share a room, separate them.  One can go in a different room with his favorite toys while the other can stay in the room for some time (set an alarm).  Stick to this for awhile and they will get used to it.  If you have other rooms, use those too.


7.  Make enough food so you have leftovers--cooking everyday?  Not me.  If you love it, good for you, but I prefer to do other things besides spending time in the kitchen while my kids are planning to wreck havoc elsewhere--I don't think so.  Watch those kids!


Well I wish nothing but the best for you and the family this remaining summer.  Don't forget to steal some time for yourself!
God bless.


Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.
So summer break with the kiddos is what it is, I'm doing the best I can.  What else can I say?