The Struggle is Real with Motherhood But We Survive

No one understood my challenges regarding being a mom as much as my grandmother who passed away May 2015.  This woman who had raised four boys and a girl with little money and a cheating spouse did the best she could with a limited education.  She cooked, cleaned, and did other practical things to obtain an income.  As her granddaughter, I was very empathetic of her lifelong struggle and tried my best when in her presence not to give her grief.

Now that I am older, I realize the value of those connections one makes with a mother who has been through far more than you.  Sure, we have our moments where we feel good about being mothers, but we also have those times when we "feel down in the pits," as Grandma described her state of mind one day.  It helps to get around people who can relate to what you may be going through while providing you with a bit of wisdom.

Whatever you do, don't close yourself off to the world.  So many mothers do that once children are born.  They act as if there is no one or nothing but spouse and/or children that complete them and that is just not true!  Children grow up and move on with their lives if they have been raised by functional parents.  Husbands and wives have been known to divorce one another.  You are more than just a mom, you are a woman with a heartbeat, a soul, emotions, etc.  Take care of you!

Grandma reminded me often to check in with how I feel and to look in the mirror and say, "I love you, Nicky."  She didn't mind telling you what you looked like when you were in her presence.  If she felt you were abandoning self by letting one's appearance decline, she told you so.  "Don't let that man ruin you...Don't let those children run you ragged!"  Her eyes meant business and she had every right to scold us, moms, because that's just what we were doing at times.

So if you are that mom who is down in the dumps and just feel plain bad, muster up all the strength in you to snap back.  Life is too short to let others bring you down.

Be encouraged this day!

All the best and many blessings to you,

Nicholl, Blog Manager and Owner


Mother And Daughter Due To Have Babies A Month Apart | 16 Kids And Count...

Update: 20 children in the family.  "Britain’s biggest family just got bigger as the Radford’s recently welcomed their 20th child. The Radfords boast Britain’s biggest brood but have said that baby Archie is, finally, their last child. The Radfords join Eamonn and Ruth, with their children, to talk about their love for their big family and the chaos of holidays!"

See this, Broadcast on 03/01/2018


Face Your Foe: When Your Foe is Your Own Offspring - Rebellious C...

Face Your Foe: When Your Foe is Your Own Offspring - Rebellious C...: A huge fight broke out between parent and child.  A son or daughter wanted to feel love, needed attention from a parent, had been repeatedly...


Make Life Easy for Yourself During the Holidays

It is already stressful enough family visiting, holiday shopping, working a job or possibly a second, cooking, cleaning, and you know the rest.  So why not make your life easy this holiday season by doing the following?

1) Delegating responsibilities.  Do you have to be the one to do everything for everyone?  Assign tasks to those in your family who can manage.  Show them how to do things as much as you can until they get them right.

2)  Avoid the holiday celebrating at your home.  If you know you are simply too busy with other things avoid entertaining at your residence.  Plan to go out and let relatives know in advance to chip in.  If you must, collect money in advance.

3) Seek to reach a compromise with your spouse.  When issues arise, choose the higher road, rather than argue until you are blue in the face.  Ask yourself, "Is what he or she requesting/wanting/doing that serious?"  When your partner doesn't want to compromise, you don't have to be the one to go along with his or her program unless of course, you want to.  Don't be used or abused this holiday season! Check out Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

4)  When in doubt, sit this one out!  It can be quite the challenge to organize, help, and encourage others, but when doubts, fears, worries, and stress are getting the best of you, address the area of confusion then take time for you to collect your thoughts, reenergize, etc. even if it means checking into a hotel for a night or two.

5)  Keep noise down in your home especially when you or someone is ill.  You can do that by choosing gifts for children and adults that are quiet this year.  Purchasing noise cancellation headphones along with gifts.  Meeting the needs immediately of whining children and difficult kin.  Cautioning those relatives who are simply too loud or just not inviting them to your next family gathering.

6)  Watch your spending or opt out of gift-giving when you are simply strapped for cash.  Many moms feel intense pressure (sometimes to the point of tears) to do for others while dads hold on to their cash tightly and sit down and watch their favorite programs on TV or elsewhere.  Why be the one to pay and decorate?  Why prepare and serve?  Why plan and visit?  Why organize and clean?  Why do more than your emotions, time, and energy can handle?

7)  Lastly, when you suffer from the symptoms of PMS, PMDD, perimenopause or some other woman related illness, do yourself and others a favor and retreat.  When you feel better, you will treat others better.

Nicholl McGuire


Like It or Not She's a Mother

For the mother who is having a hard time parenting her own children, she can either be a blessing or a curse to a relative or friend's life who is expecting.  Her occasional negativity, criticism, frustration, and anger about being a parenting can reign on the unsuspecting's parade.  Yet, one has to rise above the scorned woman and look beyond the negative scope of her views.

Admittedly I didn't plan on becoming a mother, but I also didn't plan on the mean-spiritedness to follow when I broke the news to others that I was pregnant four different times in my life.

The disappointed and judgmental attitudes that showed up on the faces of divorced mothers, mothers who just had babies, mothers who had long ago had babies and the child-free was something I will never forget.  What was wrong with these mothers?  It wasn't like I was a child having a child and even if that was the case, being mean isn't going to help matters.  Their words didn't sound like encouragement when they would say, "You pregnant?  When did this happen?  Why didn't you protect yourself?  Don't expect me to watch your baby!  Wow, I hope for the best...but what about..."

Mothers have to do a better job uplifting soon-to-be mothers.  It's unfortunate that so many moms have had their share of bad experiences which I share in my book, When Mothers Cry, but at the end of the day, your relative or friend is a new mother-- one who has chosen to bring life in the world whether the time is right or not or whether they had the baby for right or wrong reasons.

I commend those grandmothers who step up to the plate and help their daughters and grandaughters during their pregnancy challenges.  It can be such a lonely and depressing experience especially when one is pregnant by a partner who she doesn't like or love and has her share of regrets.  Those "could have, should have" conversations don't matter when a baby is on his or her way.  If anything, the words of wisdom should be about caring for one's child, coming up with additional ways to finance the needs of the child, and seeking parental resources.

With so much negativity already occurring in the world and more to come, if there is anything we should be positive about is life, ready or not.

Nicholl McGuire

Depression during the Holidays


Need a Supplemental Income? Become a Keep Designer

Recently, I got to meet an independent jewelry designer, Jamie Masselink, offline.  This young woman is making additional money running her own business via Keep Collective.  Now for those of you who have no clue who or what Keep Collective is let me briefly explain.  This is a company that offers the opportunity to customize your own jewelry.  So if you want to tell a story about your life, share hobbies, or simply give a loved one a personalized gift using an assortment of decorative charms, this is a great way to wear meaningful jewelry that can be passed down through the generations.

Keep Collective also provides an opportunity to join the company as an independent designer.  Many designers will host parties, show up at local craft fairs, market over the Internet and more to earn supplemental income.  I met Jamie at a local holiday market event and she was quite open to talk about the business and share literature.  Designers receive a 25% personal commission on each jewelry sale, free as well as 50% off on jewelry, unlimited team sales commission, and there are no deliveries or monthly sales quotas and no inventory they have to store away.

Since I know some of you moms are open to adding yet another income stream to your financial portfolio, I recommend this one to anyone who doesn't mind selling jewelry via a reputable and professional company like Keep Collective whether on a part-time or full-time basis.  I get nothing for recommending this business, but I thought I might mention it to those who are open to new possibilities.  You can get in touch with Jamie by calling 303-995-7493 to learn more and also connect with her via Facebook to check out the products and make a purchase.

To your success!



Nail Decorating can be Easy and Drama-Free this Holiday Season - Upcoming Live Event Mark Your Calendars

You know how it goes, decorating nails can be a burden.  You crack open the jar and out comes the annoying stench that everyone nearby complains about.  Then if that isn't bad enough, you spend all that time detailing your nails only for the paint to start to chip away after the first or second dish wash (sigh).  Well, I met with stylist Amanda Baugher who shared an awesome nail product by Color Street.  These nail polish strips are a base color and top coat of high quality.  They are 100% real nail polish strips.  The application is just one step and instantly dries.  The strips last up to 14 days.

When you are looking for that nail salon look in a hurry, this is the go-to nail product.  No more worrying about smudges or streaks.  This blog owner, Nicholl McGuire, will be hosting a Facebook live event on November 30th at 8 p.m. about the product giving you a chance to see the results yourself as well as how to use it.  You will not want to miss this party!  Amanda will demonstrate the ease to apply the nail strips, will be available to answer any questions, and of course events like these, you are bound to win something.  So mark your calendars!  In the meantime, if you can't wait until then, check out the nail polish strips here:  Color Street  Also, if you would like to join or add an additional income stream to your money-making goals, contact Amanda on the website, tell her Nicholl sent you and she will explain more about the business.  Have fun decorating those nails and to your business success!

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About Me

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Over 20 years office work experience, six years completed college coursework, background in print media and communications, recognized for exceptional attendance and received merit increase for past job performance, self-published author and part-time entrepreneur, Internet marketing and social media experience. Interned for non-profit organization, women's group and community service business. Additional experience: teaching/training others, customer service and sales. Learn more at Nicholl McGuire and Nicholl McGuire Media

When Mothers Cry Blog Archive