BACK TO SCHOOL (Mommy Wars Spoof) feat. Fruit of the Loom

Too Much Government Control Over Your Children from School Lunches to Trauma Based Mind Control

This has been an issue for some parents lately, judgmental cafeteria workers and teachers remarking to children at lunch time what is considered "healthy" and what isn't then talking them out of eating their lunches.  I personally have a child now who no longer wants sandwiches in his lunch thanks to the negative comments about his sweet and salty snacks (like chips and a fruit snack) from aides.  The so-called "I care" speeches turned him off.  Now he periodically (not often) eats the school lunches, but he also has some snacks just in case he doesn't want them. 

I first dealt with this issue of unhealthy school lunches when my youngest son was in Pre-K.  I had packed a sandwich (turkey breast sometimes ham) snack size apples and a couple of treats.  He told me about "What the cafeteria worker said..." when he came home that afternoon.  "She didn't want me eating that..." and pointed to a couple of small cookies.  I told my son that he could eat whatever I put in his bag.  I guess he told the worker the next day and we had no future issues.

I said the following in the past offline, and I will say it again here, the more power you give school officials, the more they will exercise it on children!  You go about your day thinking that all is well at the school, and then before long there is a note in your child's hand talking about what the teacher wants, the principal needs, what the guidelines are for an illogical school project, what holidays are being celebrated, etc.  Meanwhile, many of these notes have NOTHING to do with educating your child on the essentials, but you have been brainwashed to believe otherwise.  If I told you that a program it is "healthy, good, smart, unique, cutting-edge, successful" and it was decorated in beautiful wrapping and served to you on a 24K gold tray, you would most likely open the box, reveal about how beautiful the tray was, but then learn the hard way that the tray melts into mud and out of the box pops up a rattlesnake!  Many of these programs are just like an appealing gift box, but in time you see the side effects and quickly realize you are ill-equipped to handle that child who is out of control with his or her mouth, thinking, eating, etc.

Although helpful to your child's upbringing, this talk about nutritious meals served during lunch is helpful, but what isn't right is dictating something as personal as meals and listing everything "fun" that a child eats as unacceptable.  Meanwhile, the school has parties and encourages parents to donate, serve and finance their junk food list.  Dye for eggs to celebrate Dr. Seuss Day.  Jelly beans and marshmallow rabbits with honor given to an imaginary Easter rabbit.  Goodies for a pointy-eared Leprechaun.  Valentine sweethearts, gummy bears, sugar packs, etc. for classmates.  Edible cookies with a decoration of a FAT man in a red suit named Santa.  Now is that false god eating healthy? 

So what about this holiday education and celebrations that aren't always acknowledged at every one's homes being forced down our throats year after year by teachers?  A well-managed way to lull the masses to sleep early on about the issues that really matter like:  protests over fracking, new government laws, shady politicians, overseas mayhem with American involvement, deaths on our streets connected to bigger agendas, etc.  What bother when you need to get to the store and buy those eggs to decorate?  Why do much for community when you are overwhelmed with school activities, work or both?  What about the traumatic events of American history that isn't necessary to discuss in detail to elementary school students, yet used to split the mind?  What about sex education about all sorts of partnerships, so that the future generations will be less likely to procreate, and more?

Why throw so much at children and parents in the name of "education" and why accept everything that is thrown your way, Parents?  Look a little closer at the teachers' plans next school year.  Ask to see curriculum.  Write notes about anything that isn't sitting right with you.  Tell the teacher from the start of the year about the kind of parent you are and what you expect.  Rally support of other parents--outside of the close watch of the PTA.  Notice how major changes suggested by concerned parents at some of those meetings are quickly shot down between requests for more money and time "...to help the school."

School lunches are in your control whether you have little or a lot of money.  The government stepped in because far too many parents are letting children get obese, and besides they are assisting by giving many families help on their food bills.  So when you take government aid expect to be managed.  Some parents need to wake up and realize that many children nowadays aren't carrying around any baby fat, that is unhealthy weight they are feeding with junk food.  Many kids aren't doing much but sitting in front of devices with screens after school and on weekends and you can see it!  When many parents let their children's weight get out of control, someone/group will control it for them.

The more parents refuse to parent, the more groups, who feel they need to parent, will walk into schools and enforce rules.

Nicholl McGuire author of When Mothers Cry and other books.

21 Things and Counting When it Comes to Schools Making Money Off the Parents

A public school that two of my sons attend is indeed a money-maker!  There isn't a week that doesn't go by where we parents don't receive a list of upcoming activities, needed supplies and more that require our money.  Here are 21 things the school did to get money from us, and I'm sure someone will get the bright idea to use one or many of these ideas.  But I warn you before you bring up these ideas to money-grubbing leadership, greed will get some groups and individuals in trouble sooner or later. 


We live in a time where everyone is asking for money to pay for this and that, and for some people, including myself, it can be quite taxing especially when some smell generosity a mile away!  I'm not surprised when some parents and others go off when yet someone else is asking for a donation of money and time!  Enough already!  Greedy people and those with big ideas hoping to keep their own money to self, deserve just what they get, no support!  So check out the list of everything that has cost many parents much this year.


1. Scholastic book fairs twice a year and advertising in between to visit website to buy books.
2.  Friday weekly treats.
3.  School store.
4.  Fee to join PTA including frequent requests to volunteer for too many events to count.
5.  Restaurant events--partial proceeds go to the school when you spend money you shouldn't eating out.
6.  Afterschool programs that usually cost $80 plus dollars per child over a 10 week period.  Add gas, snacks, eating out at restaurants, uniforms, and other things needed to join the soccer team, acting, chess, science program, and other activities.
7.  Art made by the students.  A long list of things for you to buy so that your child's artwork can appear on the items.  Price range from $6 to $50 plus per item. (As if the paper crafts, drawings, cardboard box projects, and other stuff isn't already enough stuff!)
8.  T-shirts for everything your child's school participates in when competing with other schools.
9.  Holiday fund-raisers (Easter, Christmas, Valentine grams, cards, candy, novelty items, etc.)  Most companies don't support these fund-raisers because many people at work have kids doing the same thing.  The issues of having to support your own child, your co-workers, the boss' kid, etc. will take you to the poor house faster than you can say, "I don't have any money..."
10.  Buy needed school supplies at the start of the year.  (Seriously, why are we doing this, don't public schools get money from somewhere other than us?"  Just think when you have more than one child, this adds up.  Then the teacher will send a note back around again about mid-year indicating what she has run out of in the classroom.
11.  Penny collections to pay for school property.  (I can't even keep pennies in the house anymore!)
12.  Field trips. (Need I say more?)
13.  Holiday classroom parties.  "Could you please send XYZ items, and also this, and we will need that...could you donate your time too?  We really want to have a fabulous party for the children..." Who's idea was it?  You will pay for your own party!
14.  Supplies needed for recitals and plays.
15.  School projects
16.  Annual school photos (twice a year).
17.  Yearbooks
18.  Box top collections.  (Tempted to pay slightly more for an item to help your kid's school, eh?)
19.  School lunches (not everyone income qualifies to get free lunches).
20.  Library fees.  (I was on my kids like a drill sergeant this year to return books.)
21.  Uniforms bought through the school's supplier.  (No thanks, Walmart here I come.)


School leadership and staff at many schools are also beggars, score keepers, and members of a club.  I find it sad that the profession just doesn't have the reputation it once had in many circles.  I resent being asked over and over again for contributions and if you don't someone is smiling in your face asking you about doing this and doing that.  Many of us moms made financial sacrifices to be available to our children, partners and other kin.  Then along comes yet another program, request for service or money that isn't doing anything more than entertaining children that need to learn as much as they can.  (I can take them on a couple field trips myself.) Some staff use our hard-earned money for ideas that don't really pan out in the way these originators/innovators had hoped anyway. 


I pick and choose with the giving, but to be quite honest I am turned off with literally hundreds of fliers that have come home asking, "Could you help..."! 


Nicholl McGuire

When The Problem Isn't the Parent...

Those times will happen when you just can't seem to understand why your child consistently gets in trouble over some issue, has frequent accidents, and seems to have a problem with certain members in his or her class.  Now I'm not that naive parent who believes my children are angels all of the time.  I do realize that they will have their bad days.  But sometimes, it isn't their fault.  As a parent, you have to go through a process of elimination in order to get down to the root cause of frequent abnormal behaviors.

When your child is suddenly getting into trouble, consider what is going on at home, but also think about what might be happening in school.  Interview your children on what is going on at school.  Question the daily routine they follow and ask about new rules and programs.  Find out where they are seated in the classroom.  Learn names of friends and listen intently when they complain about certain students.  Make time to talk with your child's teacher, school nurse (if necessary) and/or principal.

I had an issue not that long ago where a little girl was upset with my son because he proved her wrong about an issue.  She believed that boys couldn't sing, so he sang a song and made her look silly.  Rather than just take it like a girl--lol, she hit him.  Well needless to say, she got her sassy self in trouble.  I later found out that my son was seated at a table with all girls and apparently she didn't want him to be there.  Unfortunately, this new seating arrangement made him a target because he was the odd ball at the table.  The teacher simply adjusted the seating and put him at a table that is more balanced between girls and boys, problem solved.

Another issue occurred when he repeatedly came home with wet trousers, when I inquired about this.  I found out that the bathroom was usually left in bad condition.  Therefore, he didn't feel comfortable going inside, he rather wet himself.  With a little spruce up, the bathroom was inviting; therefore my son has been utilizing the bathroom ever since.

Sometimes we can take on too many issues as parents and say, "Well if I would do this more...maybe if I would try this..."  We have to realize that it isn't always about us and it isn't always about the teacher either.  At times, problems with our children can stem from a new way of doing things in the school, a new teacher, classmate, or atmosphere.  Look at everything that might be causing problems with your child before putting unnecessary burdens on yourself!

Nicholl McGuire

When Mother Knows Best & They Don't

If you have been a mother for any length of time then your intuition concerning your children has been challenged by someone who is either helping you raise your children or occassionally babysitting for you.

He or she may not have verbally said one word about the way you raise your children, but this person may have done some things the total opposite of what you wanted them to just because they are stubborn, jealous, or just don't want to admit that you are right and they are wrong. Whatever the reason, you know your children better than the rest of them and if what you say and do is in their best interest, then by all means stand strong in your beliefs, convictions and so on.

I have been in debates with the fathers of my children over what they thought was the littlest of things. From our young children watching things on television they can't handle to what they have given them to eat. As we all know children can't digest violence without eventually acting it out on their siblings or other children. We also know that if you give a child a certain sweet snack before a meal or before bed time, you are in for some trouble. And most importantly, as mothers, we know that if you don't have a consistent bedtime for your children, they will not perform well in school and their moodiness (from being tired) gets them in trouble with you and everyone else.

The shrug of the shoulders, the eye rolls, and the attitude from bystanders because once again someone has upset you concerning your children is enough to make you want to yell at the top of your lungs, "What are you looking at?! Does anyone understand? Do you know what kind of impression you are making on my child? Who do you think you are!" Some people just don't get it! We must remember we are living in times where evil is considered good and good is considered evil. "It's okay to let our son play the rated M game, it's not that bad. Why are you so angry about him not going to bed on time? What's the big deal about our daughter going over her friend's house every Friday night? What is the problem with the way I discipline the children? You are too strict! Why can't the children listen to that song? They don't know what it means," say some fathers and relatives, but you know what's best.

I have had debates similar to the ones mentioned above and I can tell you that, in the past, I have literally exhausted myself trying to explain why wrestling isn't good for a four and five year old or why we needed to start putting money away for our children's future. If we don't stand up for what we believe is wrong for our children then who will? I put no trust in family, friend, or foe to give me accurate information and be 100% transparent when they are with my child while I am away. The reason for this is because I know that I didn't always provide every single detail to everyone about my own children, so why would I expect differently from people who don't know my children like I do?

Now I understand that when one isn't in the presence of their children due to unfortunate circumstances or is in a position where they have no choice but to let someone else spend 8 to 10 hours a day with their babies, there is a good possibility that he or she doesn't know best, but the caretaker does. How could a parent who is often working or away from their child really know what's going on if they aren't doing the following: taking time out to interview his or her son or daughter, asking specific questions about the child's experience with the caretaker, showing up to parent and teacher meetings, and most of all taking the time to listen to their child when he or she wants to talk.

In conclusion, mother doesn't always know what's best, but when she does, she just wants someone to listen and do what she asks when it comes to the children's mental and physical well-being. Is that too much to ask?


Nicholl McGuire
http://www.myspace.com/howtobooks