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Monday

7 Things to Do with and for Children Before School Starts

It is never too early to consider what needs to be done concerning the children before they go back to school.  With budgets being limited, time and patience being few and far in between, a mother has to exercise those time management skills and also be somewhat of a prophetess.  Future predictions include:


1.  Your children will forget some of the important information they learned/struggled with in certain subjects and will need a refresher; otherwise, those headaches helping with homework will return.  Make time to pull out some worksheets (at least once a week) and get those minds going again.


2.  They will have outgrown many of their things.  Is there a budget in place to ensure that their back to school wardrobe is suitable?


3.  They most likely will not be able to tend to everything you want them to during the summer which will roll over into the school year.  Tackle the "To Do" lists that you both have.  Did your son/daughter get to do the main things that they wanted this summer?  Have you got them to help you with your chore list?


4.  Health issues that you put off concerning children will not go away and will only get worse.  Cut the chronic problems off as soon as possible.  Do you really want them to miss school and cause you to miss some work days too over issues that should have long ago been addressed?


5.  Have children visited with the people they really wanted to this summer?  Sometimes relatives/friends can be a big help, so why not make arrangements for the kids to see them.  Don't let an entire summer pass by and they don't get to see the people who mean so much to them (even if you don't care for those folks).


6.  Converse with older and younger ones about all sorts of things.  From how they dealt with past school challenges to what their plans might be for next summer.  It is better to outline goals now and work toward them, then be faced with issues throughout the year that could have been handled before school started.


7.  Put money aside for needed school supplies.  There are those that the stores put out and then there are supplies that accompany teacher's lesson plans.  Don't spend money buying a bunch of things now that may not be needed.  Focus on the essentials and if you can talk with someone who is familiar with the teacher or grade level, then do so and plan accordingly.


Hope this list helps someone out there.  The less you have to deal with prior to the school bell ringing, the better.


Nicholl McGuire author of When Mothers Cry and Tell Me Mother You're Sorry

Saturday

Cut Some of Those Tasks Down this Holiday

Find the short-cuts when it comes to preparing meals this holiday.  Fall back on some of those other things you typically do if they take up too much time and energy.  Avoid traveling with little ones if you have to.  Overall, make your day easy--you can do it!  So what you forgot to make a dish, missed an engagement, or have some people at home angry with you.  Relax.  You are not superwoman so don't try to be.  If people are disappointed, critical, or moody because of you, let them!  Apologize and keep it moving or say nothing and keep on smiling! 

America is not the only country that's independent, you are too even if you are married and have children!  You can think independently, make your own decisions and take care of yourself.  Your world doesn't revolve around family.  So if you don't feel like doing something, you prefer to take a break, and you really aren't in the mood to talk, well guess what?  Give yourself permission to be free!

No more crying, complaining or cursing today.  Be blessed in the land of the free!

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7

Wednesday

Summer Break with the Kiddos Gettin' to You Yet?

Oh the joy of summer!  Kids staying up late and sleeping in (sometimes).  "What are we going to do today?  Are we going to Toys R Us?  I want to go to the movies...Do you think we can go to...?"  Those requests to do everything that costs money (sigh).


The other day I looked at my sons, they grew again.  The pjs on one child was like Michael Jackson's skinny pants in the 80s.  The elder child's head seemed to get bigger along with his vocabulary.  He's 8 years old with an idea and a plan to crowdsource one of his projects.  Why do I get the feeling that his business will surpass mine by leaps and bounds when he gets started?  I think I might be working for him soon.


With long school breaks, a parent has to acquire more patience, strategies on keeping children busy (if you can't drop them off at a daycare or with relatives).  Funny, I bumped into one of the childcare specialists at the library who watched my children last year while I worked outside the home.  She was happy to see us and gave me a couple tips on getting them off to a good start this summer.  I was ready to pass them on to her like a track runner slapping a baton into his teammate's hand that day.  Instead, I smiled and told her, "Thanks for the tips."


So far we have summer weekdays that are made up of the following: time to eat, time to eat again, time to do chores, time to play, time to be quiet, time to go out and run, time to learn something new, time to go here and there, time to take care of business, time to eat again, time to eat again, time to...well you get the point.  I almost forgot, there are some things that I do to make life a little less stressful with the children.  They are as follows:


1.  No picking up the phone when I'm already busy with them and everything else.  I really don't like having to keep others entertained when I have much to do.  They can hear the stress in my voice, and for a few folks, they take that sort of thing personal.  Texting is okay, but I am careful with that too.  Sometimes the messages can come across like you are angry or something.  So if I know my children are not engrossed in something, I don't pick up the phone.  Also, I put me first during those tough times if you know what I mean. Kids don't have a clue what ladies' issues consist of, so some stuff they want to do is put on hold until I can get myself together.  "Hey kids you know women have some problems and sometimes they have to sit down, so go play quietly and if you do good we might do something on another day."  They have a look of concern and then they are gone--they know better.


2.  I have little patience for cooking large meals and I don't like going into the kitchen as often as they eat.  So I trained the 7 and 8 year old to get some snacks in between meals without my assistance. (FYI - Hide your knives.  You will also need to instruct them on what it is forbidden to touch.  I still watch them moving around in the kitchen even when they think I'm not looking).


3.  All computers and mobile devices are monitored with family safety tools.  So I don't have to stand over them like a drill sergeant.


4.  Television is limited to a certain time period.  FYI - check for the timer feature that will shut it off.  (Note: you can do the same using Internet safety products i.e.) Microsoft Family Safety.


5.  Take those kids out so that they can run around.  A wide open space is a blessing even if it doesn't have any playground equipment.


6.  Put a limit on children playing in the same room together.  They get tired of one another.  So if they share a room, separate them.  One can go in a different room with his favorite toys while the other can stay in the room for some time (set an alarm).  Stick to this for awhile and they will get used to it.  If you have other rooms, use those too.


7.  Make enough food so you have leftovers--cooking everyday?  Not me.  If you love it, good for you, but I prefer to do other things besides spending time in the kitchen while my kids are planning to wreck havoc elsewhere--I don't think so.  Watch those kids!


Well I wish nothing but the best for you and the family this remaining summer.  Don't forget to steal some time for yourself!
God bless.


Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.
So summer break with the kiddos is what it is, I'm doing the best I can.  What else can I say?

Friday

Mother Manipulation - Tell Me Mother You're Sorry by Nicholl McGuire

At some time during your life, someone or a group of people close to you will do something that will leave you speechless.  You will be angered, disappointed, resentful, and might even vow revenge.  The last thing you want is to have to cut off your mother, mother-in-law, or some one else because of their wicked ways, but it happens.


In the book, "Tell Me Mother You're Sorry" this a book that exposes the playbook of manipulative mothers.  If you have felt uneasy about your mother or in-law and thought about going low or no contact, then this is a book for you.  Let's face it, most prideful women are not going to apologize especially if they don't believe they are wrong about anything.  Some who do might be sincere, while others not so much. 


The truth that this book brings to the reader will cause you to think about yourself and how you or someone else you know might be using some negative behaviors to get needs met from sons and daughters.  As strange as it seems, sometimes the very challenges we have with women in our lives, we can be just as guilty!


So do take a moment to check out "Tell Me Mother You're Sorry" by Nicholl McGuire.  I really hope that you will feel validated when you read the book and just know that your peace is just around the corner if you want it! 


The inspiration for this book is credited to my late grandmother.  She unfortunately passed away before this book was complete.


Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.  For the copy of the book, see here.

Wednesday

When They Say You Act Like Your Mother

Just when you thought you were your own person, independent, strong and free of parental programming, a long comes someone who knows your mother and out comes, "You act just like your mother..."  Depending on your relationship with her, you are offended by this comment.  You might retort, "Don't say that!  I am not my mother!"  The truth is we all have a little bit of our mothers and possibly grandmothers in us.  But we don't have to embrace all that comes with these women either!

Let's just say that you might say and do things that do remind others that you are your mother's child, and those ways are not good.  Then it would make sense to work to change them.  Talking to Mom everyday or visiting with her is not going to help you self improve.  Instead, what you will find is that the behaviors you don't like about your mother r yourself will only be reinforced.  If you don't want to be like someone, it would make sense to create some distance so that you can discover who you want to be and not what Mother says you should be.

When the voice of your mother shows up to criticize, abuse, control, or tell you about your new self n progress, tell that voice, "I will not receive that today...No, I am not going to do or say that...My mother would have, but not me..."  Practice redirecting your thoughts everyday.  Read items your mother would never look at, go places she wouldn't visit, see things she would turn her nose up at, broaden your horizons!

The next time someone says, "You act just like your mother!"  Respond with, "I might, but I am working to change that."

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Tell Me Mother You're Sorry on Blurb.com 

Saturday

How to Get Some Sleep When You Have a Newborn

Be Encouraged! Throwback: Fantasia - Baby Mama

There is More to Talk About Besides Being a Mother - Don't Want to Talk About the Kids

Sometimes as mothers we reach points during our day where we don't want to say another thing to our kids or talk about them to anyone not even our spouses.  It can be tiresome.  Some don't understand why and others think we want to hear about their kids.

If you have experienced something like this or feel this way now, "Please, I just don't want to talk about my kids..." don't worry you are not alone and it doesn't mean you love your kids any less because you don't want to share another picture, video, or conversation with someone about them for awhile.  Just like one can get burned out with talking about certain relatives, news, celebrities, and more, one can also get tired of talking about children.

I thought of this topic when I read an article about what childless or childfree women wanted mothers to know.  Some of these ladies have their issues with mothers talking to them about why they don't have children.  From the writing, you can detect a couple women just didn't want to keep talking about their private business.

So I end with this,  just because we all wear some kind of title such as: "Mother, Single Woman, Divorced, Married, Childfree, Childless..." doesn't mean we want to share every personal detail about it or answer every question that someone poses, especially on days when it is simply challenging enough being a woman.

Here's ideas on some alternative conversations that have nothing to do with children unless you redirect the topics back to your children.

1.  So how's things coming along with your job, hobby, craft, business, projects...?

2.  I heard about your spouse/friend/relative how is she/he?

3.  How do you feel?

4.  What have you watched lately on television?  Which shows are your favorite?

5.  Do you have any favorite songs, musicians?

6.  Where did you go recently to unwind or where are you thinking of going?

7.  Do you have any personal plans for the upcoming holiday?

8.  When was the last time you visited the mall?  Did you buy anything?

9.  What do you think of the (mention something that happened in the news)?  You didn't see it?  Let me catch you up to date?

10.  Have you been to (fill in the blank)?  If you would like to go, I'm free on....

Mom will thank you for the good conversation and getting away from the children sooner or later. God bless.

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight about relationship, spirituality, family, business and more here.


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This freelance writer, author, wife, and mother of four has been writing for almost 20 years about a wide variety of topics ranging from spiritual experiences to self-improvement products. Nicholl has also been a leasing consultant for multi-family dwelling complexes and an events planner in Euclid OH. During 2004 she relocated to San Diego CA and continued leasing apartments to singles and families. In 2006, she became a community manager at an elderly housing complex in downtown Los Angeles. Since then she has been working as a writer from home. Nicholl self-published her first book entitled, "Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate." For more information about the book visit Amazon.com She has another book also on Amazon, entitled, "When Mothers Cry" as well as other books. For more of her work, feel free to stop by Blurb.com. There she has creative photo and journal books. If you have benefited in any way from Nicholl's writing, please do take a moment to show support, buy any one of her books, share her posts, subscribe or comment. Be blessed!

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