"If someone had paid closer attention, didn't leave me alone with her, and periodically checked in on me, just maybe my cousin wouldn't have tried to show me a thing or two--thank God her plans were unsuccessful and I wasn't naked, but still the feeling--it stayed with me for years."
I thought of sharing my encounter as a child with a female relative, but that isn't the point of this blog entry and I just don't want to rehash every little fart about my life. Rather, I want to drive a point home, don't trust children alone for long periods of time, I repeat don't trust children alone! I know on weekends you are tired and you want to sleep in, but seriously try waking up early or staying up late and going into your children's bedroom or anywhere in your home where children are supposed to be sleeping/playing/reading. Also, check the basement, the closet, and any place that children enjoy creeping out of adult's site and quite possibly getting into a relative's stash. Make periodic checks like a security guard, walk the backyard behind trees/treehouses, the side of the house, pop up at the neighbor's house where your child is visiting, the backseat of a car, in the family room behind the couch, and even in the bathroom, children who like to "play house" or who are older just looking for some time alone, watch them!
I know that sometimes we think that our children are innocent and wouldn't think about such things, but they will attempt to emulate what they see on TV sooner or later. From sexy scenes to silly nude acts, whatever looks interesting to a child, they will try it. Some are bolder than others. Some are fearful they might get caught. Some are sneaky and others are liars. You might think you know your child, but do you?
I will be the first to admit that I am the parent who sits back and observes my children's personalities in action and I think about what and who they have been exposed to. My young boys have watched Disney and other shows when I wasn't around and liked looking at the teen shows. So I decided to monitor them more closely, now my one son is talking about when he gets older what girl he likes and will marry etc. I can't stand those teen shows with the boy crushes! Ugh!
My teen aged son has seen his share of things online when he was supposedly playing video games at a friend's house while living with his dad. I was angry for a long time about that one. Another son thought that "wrestling" with his brother was okay. He didn't look very aggressive and moving like a snake on his brother is not a wrestling move--I put a stop to that quickly! There is no showering together, hanging out in the bathroom, garage, closet, etc. "What are you doing in there?" I shout. Then I get off my butt and go see. I can't honestly say or ensure anyone what might happen if they get around a girl or two especially when I have another son that is honestly looking like a young man, rather than a tween and the fast girls are just showing off legs, wearing tight shirts, and shaking their broke behinds already (notice I didn't say shake their money-makers!)
Oh yes, the joys of parenting...don't trust those kids, I'm telling you! Let them earn your trust! Pop up on them, "Hey just checking on you, what's up?" mom says. Use a camera or two if you suspect something. Don't believe they are having cookies and milk over their friend's house--lol! Sorry that this blog entry sounds bad to those of you who just believe that your teen son or daughter isn't interested in boys and girls--hmmm what about girls and girls and boys and boys? But hey, you just might save your daughter from getting pregnant or getting an STD or questioning whether she wants to bi-sexual, lesbian or straight after that interesting experience with her girlfriend--just saying. Who knows, you might be protecting your son from a potential identity crisis if you watched for signs that friends aren't really just friends. And maybe just maybe, you might prevent a fighting match with an angry parent banging on your front door accusing you or your child of something that he/she/you did or didn't do. A situation like that happened when I was a teen, a girl lied to everyone in a summer program I was in about sneaking away with some boy-- you think her parents weren't ready to beat up on every instructor in the group! I don't know what her experience was like with the strange boy, but it messed her up for life.
Sorry kids, I don't trust you.
Nicholl McGuire
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