12 Things You Can Do When Your Children Aren't Around

Are you constantly putting things off because your children keep disrupting the time you need to get things done?  Soon you will have that much needed time for yourself and you will want to take advantage of it.  Sometimes when the opportunity comes, we fail to do some things on our wish lists, because we simply forget!  So here are 10 things that might serve as reminders for you.  Post them somewhere so you can see them, then when that unexpected time to be alone comes, you will be ready!  You might want to create task lists to get things done related to:  family, personal development, social life, health, finances, work, home, fun, spirituality, and community related activities.  This is helpful when it comes to jogging your memory on what you have been putting off for a long time including those bookmarked links you were supposed to read or YouTube videos you said you would watch later--what else might be on your computer you could be enjoying?


1.  Check your electronic devices to see what notes you might have but forgot about. (Did you return phone calls or make important ones yet?)  You could also clean devices both inside and out.


2.  Window shop and compare prices.  Definitely a must-do when children aren't around, because you are better able to focus on your shopping lists.


3.  Attend a movie, visit a park, walk a museum, or do something that takes your mind off home life.


4.  Enjoy breakfast or lunch at a restaurant you always wanted to go to but couldn't because you didn't want to take kids.


5.  Meet relatives, friends or co-workers at a social event i.e.) wedding, baby shower, funeral, etc.


6.  Get your nails done.  Isn't it so nice to see freshly manicured nails?


7.  Go to church or bible study.  Sometimes being around like-minded folks does wonders!


8.  Clean and organize your home. (See my blog on organizing here.)


9.  Transfer photos from digital camera, print and organize.  Mail photos to distant relatives.  People enjoying seeing things in the mail besides junk and bills.


10.  Spend time with your husband.  When was the last time you made love?


11. Work-out.  Are you happy with what you see in the mirror?


12.  Work your home business.  What tasks have you been putting off that is keeping you from making supplemental income?


You probably can think of 12 more things.  But whatever you come up with, be sure you are making the best use of your free time!  I will tell you from personal experience, I actually feel better when I know that I didn't spend my valuable free time doing things like chatting too long with loved ones, surfing the Internet, or doing tasks that could be done when the children are around.  So start enjoying that much needed free time!


Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7

7 Tips on Getting a Break from Children with Little or No Money

Does it seem that your children are dominating every part of your day?  If you feel overwhelmed with your children lately, here are some suggestions on how to get some free time throughout the day to catch your breath.

1.  Utilize a room in your residence that isn't dedicated to children.  If you don't have one, create a space.  This will be your time-out spot.  Explain to your children why this area is off-limits.  Reward them when they are not in that area and are keeping quiet.

2.  Busy your children with some toys/activities that they haven't done for awhile.  Electronics with headphones are a plus.  Also, most wanted new toys (without sound and have parts that stay intact) will keep their interest for awhile.  If you don't have money to buy new toys, take old ones out and rotate toys.  It will feel like Christmas all over again for them.  Take building blocks and dump them in the middle of their floor and let them create while you do what you need to do.

3.  When you can get away from your children (because someone is at home to watch them or you dropped them off elsewhere), visit with loved ones, go to a park, eat at a restaurant alone, or just sit in your car somewhere peaceful.  The needed break will rejuvenate you!

4.  Purchase popular movies (Thrift store, yard sale, online auction, bookstore) or borrow them from the local library, they will keep the children entertained for at least a couple of hours.

5.  Send children to bed early or encourage a nap or "Do Nothing" time.  This is so helpful when you need to get things done in the middle of the afternoon or late during the evening through the night.  Of course, they will put up a fuss but at least you gain your needed free time!

6.  Make plans to go to bed early then awake early (hopefully before the children get up).  This way you will be in the frame of mind to at least start what you need to do, rather than tending to their needs. 

7.  Take them to events where you are able to drop them off ie.) birthday parties, extracurricular activities, etc.)

When all else fails, always look for opportunities for help ie.) school counselors, community centers, welfare office, non-profit agencies, etc.

Nicholl McGuire  

Opting Out of Mommy Invites

The invitations have come to me over the years to attend playgroups with mothers, to go to someone’s child’s birthday party, to sit with a parent watching children at home, to watch a school performance, or to walk through a children’s museum with another parent. Do you already see what is wrong with this picture? If you don’t see by now what I am getting at then you are most likely the parent asking everyone to attend various kid functions. You probably have wondered why your friend or even your sister keeps opting out. I will tell you in the coming paragraphs why. However, if you are not the parent always asking another parent to attend a children’s event but are usually the one being invited, but you don’t go, I’m not mad at you, if anything, I support you.

I am a mother of four so the last place I want to be invited to is yet another children’s event. If anything, I want someone to invite me to a place that has no children! When I have what little free time I can get, I try to stay away from family restaurants, family events, family functions and anything else where there might be a child present. I see absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to go somewhere anywhere where there is no children present even if it means running a hot bath while no one is at home or sitting alone in a room by candlelight saying the words as one health nutritionist, Rose Carter, suggests, “Positivity in, negativity out…”

I don’t understand why a mother would be insulted by another mother not wanting to attend children’s events. I don’t get it, a mother runs herself ragged trying to keep up with every little activity her children participate in and then wants you to tag along!? She then becomes offended because others just aren’t interested in what her little itty bitty boo boo is doing. I personally think that some women have forsaken being a woman altogether for being a mother. Here’s a quick test you can do on yourself or someone else to see if you have forsaken who you are as a woman. Try spending some time alone without thinking or doing something for your family. This means “no” doing the following: talking about your man or children, doing laundry, creating a shopping list, putting your children’s toys away or ironing their clothes, doing things around the house to help your partner, shopping for things for the house, or anything else for that matter that have nothing to do with finding your sense of self. I bet you most women will fail! That valuable time of peace could have been best used to do the following: your hair, shave your legs, put some make up on, take a long walk, watch a movie you have been putting off, call a girlfriend, make appointments to see a doctor, a friend, or anything else you have been procrastinating about, or answer all those emails you have been ignoring from family and friends (I’m sure some of them are insulted by now and are talking about how you never respond to your emails.)

There are those women who love the children’s events because they get the opportunity to meet like-minded mothers and for that I understand, because I don’t mind attending them within reason. But once I have met a mother at one of those gatherings, I am not interested in going places with her with her children or mine in tote all the time. I don’t want to talk about what great thing her child did, so that she can question me about what great thing my child did then later she is comparing her child to mine. To be quite honest, I could care less about what anyone’s child is or isn’t doing. It’s hard enough just raising my own to be concerned about other people’s children. When a parent starts bragging or venting about their child to me, I personally give the child’s name to God and leave it there. I don’t say too much if anything about my own usually I change the subject and talk about anything but my man and children.

There are plenty of mothers in this world, actually more than enough, but where are the women? Where are those youthful spirits who use to say, “Hey why don’t we go to the mall and just try on stuff? What about joining this group and having fun meeting new people? How about we create something that will make others come out the house and live a little? What about doing something that will take our minds off the man and the children? I’ll be over to pick you up, you better be ready!” As I write I think of limo rides, flea markets, vacations, bed and breakfasts, bowling, skating, laughing while walking through a sexy novelty shop, and a whole slew of other fun, crazy, and downright money-making ways to get women together not mothers! If you are this kind of WOMAN, I praise you for it!


Nicholl McGuire