"I really didn't mean to do it, I mean what I was trying to say was..." a parent attempts to have a conversation about sex and it just doesn't seem to go right. So concerned about either telling too much or not enough, mom worries. You did the best you could mom, take a deep breath.
Whatever we say or do is going to somehow enter the brain of the kid and he or she is still going to put her spin on it sooner or later. The hope is that he or she doesn't say or do anything stupid. As a parent, you don't want to invite trouble when you talk so candidly about sex, but you also want to keep it away by discouraging the experience.
The reality is one day it is going to happen, but most parents just don't want it occurring under their roofs or someone else's. The STDs, the pregnancy, and the undeveloped mind can be traumatized--these are valid concerns.
Children know something about sex, sexy or something leading to something that is just bad. I think of my son who yelled, "Don't say sexy--that's bad." He knew from watching scantily dressed women gyrating in commercials, music videos, on the street, and elsewhere that what they were doing wasn't nice. Another child was quite bold, "They want to have sex..." Not that long ago, the same children wanted to know if mommy was having sex. They said, they saw a man talk about it on YouTube in a comedy. Fortunately, they had no specific details where they felt like they needed to experiment. But by the time that issue was addressed, they knew they didn't come from the sky.
Parents everywhere are forced to talk about some thing whether they like it or not. The truth has a way of showing up in one way or another. One doesn't want the street teaching the kids about sex or sexy or some goofy stranger on the Internet, a peer or a guy or gal who just loves children a bit too much--if you know what I mean. So a parent's goal for the new year, especially when children are often around other children, might have something to do with how to protect themselves from those two words, sex and sexy. Make sure that one is not encouraging either at an age where children can't pay one bill personally or in your home, they can't live in their own if something should happen, and you have no money to pay out to a family who might come knocking on your door asking for child support.
Nicholl McGuire
Whatever we say or do is going to somehow enter the brain of the kid and he or she is still going to put her spin on it sooner or later. The hope is that he or she doesn't say or do anything stupid. As a parent, you don't want to invite trouble when you talk so candidly about sex, but you also want to keep it away by discouraging the experience.
The reality is one day it is going to happen, but most parents just don't want it occurring under their roofs or someone else's. The STDs, the pregnancy, and the undeveloped mind can be traumatized--these are valid concerns.
Children know something about sex, sexy or something leading to something that is just bad. I think of my son who yelled, "Don't say sexy--that's bad." He knew from watching scantily dressed women gyrating in commercials, music videos, on the street, and elsewhere that what they were doing wasn't nice. Another child was quite bold, "They want to have sex..." Not that long ago, the same children wanted to know if mommy was having sex. They said, they saw a man talk about it on YouTube in a comedy. Fortunately, they had no specific details where they felt like they needed to experiment. But by the time that issue was addressed, they knew they didn't come from the sky.
Parents everywhere are forced to talk about some thing whether they like it or not. The truth has a way of showing up in one way or another. One doesn't want the street teaching the kids about sex or sexy or some goofy stranger on the Internet, a peer or a guy or gal who just loves children a bit too much--if you know what I mean. So a parent's goal for the new year, especially when children are often around other children, might have something to do with how to protect themselves from those two words, sex and sexy. Make sure that one is not encouraging either at an age where children can't pay one bill personally or in your home, they can't live in their own if something should happen, and you have no money to pay out to a family who might come knocking on your door asking for child support.
Nicholl McGuire
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