There are moms who are fighting the good fight everyday! They fight with children, fight through traffic, fight with co-workers, fight with in-laws, and even fight with partners. It wasn't always like this! She used to be a nice, docile type adored and appreciated by family and friends.
A woman who has been through storms in her life and is still trying to protect herself from current storms is not a happy woman especially when she is living with an unhappy partner. He lies about sexual conquests, disrespects her and the children, ignores the family's need for attention, and often chooses to accommodate his selfish needs; rather than consider the needs of others. She is being abused whether she wants to call it that.
How can she raise well-adjusted, dare I say it, normal children when all this unnecessary stress is in and around her. It's hard enough just living especially if she has PMS or menopausal issues, now she has to contend with an abusive partner or spouse!
Something has got to give! She must look at her life from the outside in and realize that someone is going to get hurt if she keeps going out without a coat, umbrella and boots in these storms. Will it be the children? Will it be her? Will it be him? A victim has an excuse for everything. She reasons that nothing is as bad as it seems. She believes she has nothing to worry about. She thinks that the children will be alright, but we all know better--some of you reading this probably wished mom and dad had never met.
So with all this said, how does her issues with the man affect her parenting? Here are a few signs:
She frequently yells at the children for no apparent reason.
She complains a lot about her family issues.
She often thinks about getting away from her family.
She believes that drinking alcohol or smoking illegal drugs will take the edge off, so that she can face another day.
She allows her husband/boyfriend to get away with things even though she knows his actions are killing her inside.
She fantasizes about a divorce and/or seeing other men.
She wishes she never had children.
If you have any or all of these signs, you must re-evaluate what is happening in your personal life and how you intend to make some changes. My sincere prayers go out to you!
Nicholl McGuire wrote the book in the video, Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate on Amazon.com
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