Thursday

Some Mothers Don't Like Other Mothers

As much as we might not want to admit this, but there are one or two individuals in our circles that simply have a problem with mothers.  Now the trouble-maker is a mother, someone who is a career mom or home-maker, shuffling children around here and there, cares for her babies, and does other motherly things, but she doesn't like motherhood much, other mothers, or even her own mother.  She is just getting by with all other negative emotions!  From childhood woes to a bad relationship that left her with nothing more than a child, she is sad, depressed, jealous, and going through whatever other emotion that keeps her from truly connecting with other mothers on a spiritual, emotional or physical level.

Angry that things didn't turn out the way she had hoped in her life, an emotionally, physically and spiritually bond, mom is often disappointed with no real means of escape.  In her mind, everyone else is the cause of this issue and that issue, but never her.  "If my mother was more like...if my children's father would have...if these mothers would do this..." she thinks.

The bitter mom has more drama than most and usually speaks quite negatively about her family.  She lies when she is around other mothers who appear to be much happier and settled in their lives.  The mom exaggerates her love for everyone as if someone is going to question her about her personal views, and she covers up her feelings with a plastic smile or fake laugh.  She fears being judged, warned, advised, or corrected when it comes to her parenting practices, so if she doesn't have to call, write or come around others she won't. 

For some of you reading this, you might be that mother who one day exposes, admonishes or dismisses the troubled woman in your group who keeps tension flying amongst others.  You might not intentionally mean to tell this mother the truth about herself or ugly ways, but then again who knows what God might use you to do.  Yet, somehow something you say or do is going to ruffle the angry mom's feathers and she is going to come back with some insulting retort, deep sigh, eye-rolls, or outburst.  You see, a mother who doesn't really like being a mother or enjoys the company of other mothers, doesn't take too kindly too practical advice no matter how nice you say it. 

Many mothers who have little time or patience with others are usually the ones who pop off, not only with those in their own families (like husbands, mother-in-laws, etc.), but with others outside the family network too.  She finds faults with most people to cover up her own.  "Oh how could she do that...what kind of mother would...?"  Meanwhile, she never bothers to look at the evil thoughts she wrestles with from one day to the next or her questionable parenting practices when it comes to raising her children while claiming to be "a Christian, a Believer, a good mom."  When challenged on her foolishness, she perfers to argue.  "I think it is alright for my son to play games that shoot bad guys...I think it is okay for my daughter to dress like Lady Gaga or Nicki Minaj...I see nothing wrong with saying bad words around my children, they will hear them anyway!" She reasons all is okay. "What about you...don't tell me anything! My children are fine!"

The mother, who doesn't like other mothers, enjoys being around select individuals, who like her, don't enjoy children much, but tolerate them.  She hopes to get a few good laughs about others' short-comings.  When she is weary of her children, she is all-too-ready to enlist a babysitter or two (even if they are not the best people for her children to be around) and welcomes anyone in her circle who can save her time and money by doing things for her kids. 

These selfish moms don't like generous moms, because they sometimes feel they have to help them even when they don't want to.  She thinks, "Oh, I wish she wouldn't buy my children anything, because I don't want to feel obligated to her...I don't know why she spends so much time with those kids, I wouldn't--they would get on my nerves."

For some it might be difficult to believe that there are such mothers in this world, but there are, and this is why sometimes you have that one in your group who just can't seem to get along with other mothers.  You might have a mom who is often jealous concerning other mothers.  She might be the one always at war about what this one and that one said to her. 

It is difficult for some moms to sit in the presence of others not having a clue as to how to love, care, nurture, or create an atmosphere that is in the best interest of their children.  Pride keeps some from getting the necessary help to come up higher when it comes to relating to other mothers.  Love of money and material things are more important than relationships so she doesn't much care about others unless they have what she has or can benefit her in some way. 

For the mother who doesn't like others like her, she doesn't want to face this personal truth.  She rather sweep it under the rug.  But if she has a faith, she might want to consider taking her issues to the Lord and ask him to put more love in her heart for family and fellow mothers and take away jealous and bitter feelings in Jesus name. 

Nicholl McGuire author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

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Over 20 years office work experience, six years completed college coursework, background in print media and communications, recognized for exceptional attendance and received merit increase for past job performance, self-published author and part-time entrepreneur, Internet marketing and social media experience. Interned for non-profit organization, women's group and community service business. Additional experience: teaching/training others, customer service and sales. Learn more at Nicholl McGuire and Nicholl McGuire Media

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