Jealous Parents, Relatives & Friends

You have been around the world, seen more things then most people could ever imagine, speak three languages maybe more, and received numerous accolades for school, college and work performance. People call you blessed; others say you’re talented, while some just look at you and smile. Yet, you see something behind some of those smiles. You notice their demeanor seems to be sad. They walk away from you with nothing to say. You may expect this kind of behavior from your friends, but your mother, father or sibling? How does one cope with a jealous relative who still wallows in past successes and has nothing recent to show for his or her work?

One. Don’t brag or rub your accomplishments in their face.

This point is obvious but some overachievers are tempted to tell everyone about their accomplishments, to the point that they are overwhelming listeners. However, jealous people who don’t respond well to others doing things they always wanted to do or are not disciplined enough to follow their own dreams will respond with, “I always wanted to do that…you are always doing something good…you think you are better than the rest of us!” Notice they don’t bother to compliment you.

Two. Avoid talking with them too long about your plans.

Some accomplished people will spend a lot of time outlining what project they are working on, who they will be working with (in other words name dropping) and why they are doing it even when no one has asked them for that much information. A jealous person will take everything he or she has just learned and either help the successful relative or friend for a season just to learn more about the project or start one similar. They may also hurt your efforts by bad-mouthing you to others.

Three. Ask them for input only if you think they are qualified enough to contribute.

When you know someone is jealous of you, be cautious. You don’t want their opinion, money, or skill if they have bad feelings about you. It is best to find someone who is more secure in their own achievements to help.

Four. Listen to what other relatives tell them about you.

There will be relatives that will tell you something about the jealous individual that they don’t want getting around, so they will ask that “you not say anything.” If what they are saying can be proved without naming them, then consider their warning and don’t get the jealous person involved with your business endeavors.

Five. Don’t force them into a conversation they know nothing about.

You never want to use words they are unfamiliar with, share information they have never learned, or do something that is foreign or strange and ask them for assistance. A jealous person may also feel small, if they don't like what you are saying or talk in a tone that bothers them. No one wants to feel like they are being talked down to or made to look like a fool. Both of which you will be accused of if you let this jealous person in your life.

Six. Change your thinking when you feel tempted to show them up.

Jealous people will usually let their emotions take center age for the entire world to see. They will make a big deal out of small matters. What you may feel tempted to do is use your knowledge to give them a good whipping. Whatever you do don’t do it, because if everyone else hears about what you did, you may cause problems for yourself and others may judge you as “arrogant, conceited, a know-it-all, and/or rude!”

Seven. When they are disrespectful, keep any and all future news about your successes to yourself.

A jealous person can easily say things to offend you because they know enough about your interests to use them against you. Once they have disrespected you with one of their insults, learn from the confrontation to never share anything else and ask others to direct the jealous person to you if he or she has any future questions, concerns, or suggestions.

Eight. If you are in a creative field, don’t let them listen, read, watch, or assist with your work before it's released to the public.

You don’t want a jealous person’s input on what you do, because you will find yourself rearranging and possibly throwing away your hard work. Secretly that’s what a jealous person wants is for you to not accomplish anything. They may even disrupt you a lot while your working hoping that you are frustrated and will give your project up!

Nine. Don’t gossip about them to other family members.

As much as you would like to expose this envious man or woman don’t, especially if he or she is a relative. Exposing jealous family members has a way of backfiring on you and then others may turn your observation around and accuse you of being jealous of them. Don’t even allow others to get you to talk about your enemy.

Ten. If you have a faith, pray for your enemy.

You can use your faith to secretly fight against them. Since jealousy is nothing more than a spirit that inhabits the body due to allowing bad feelings to manifest. You can combat this snake by cutting its head off! In other words, when the jealous person is around don’t feed into his or her comments, be too busy for conversation, don’t invite them to your events, and never share your ideas with them.

Jealous parents and relatives may not do all they can to help their children for fear of what they may become which is better than them. A mother may sabotage a relative's plans to invest in your future by bad mouthing you. A father may avoid helping you by not doing anything to invest in a dream that he once had and now you have. A relative may stop talking to you and start talking to your siblings because she is jealous of the success and exposure you are getting that she could never get due to her attitude. These people who claim they love you are usually jealous because you are doing things in your life that they know they should have been doing long ago, so they push you harder than they need to.

Some researchers say that usually a child will only go as far as the parents will go in education. So if your parent dropped out of high school or college the probability of you doing the same increases. There are many children who defy the odds and do far better than their parents. Children learn by example which is often preached by early childhood experts. Parents who never seek the help they need to become better people than their parents will only pass on their failures to their own children.

Written by Nicholl McGuire

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Over 20 years office work experience, six years completed college coursework, background in print media and communications, recognized for exceptional attendance and received merit increase for past job performance, self-published author and part-time entrepreneur, Internet marketing and social media experience. Interned for non-profit organization, women's group and community service business. Additional experience: teaching/training others, customer service and sales. Learn more at Nicholl McGuire and Nicholl McGuire Media

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