Taking a Break or Being Lazy?

When you really desire to take a break from being Mom is when you know you need to be. 

Hello, I'm Nicholl McGuire and today I would like to share some thoughts about being a mom.

I took a break not that long ago from children yet again.  I have made a point to do this periodically, because for me it isn't easy being a Mom.  I have done the whole "I can't be away from my children" super mom stuff in the past and to be quite honest, I put myself in the hospital.  So breaks for me is a good thing.

Not everyone can parent well when there is much work, opposition, trouble, trial--you name it--all around.  Just when you think you are doing great with so much activity going on, there are a few witnesses looking on the outside in saying, "Not so.  You feed the children too much.  You buy them too many things.  You let them play too many video games.  They are involved in too much.  When do you make time to nurture your relationship with your spouse?"  Get my point?

So sometimes you can't do it all and well either.  Those "I can't do..." feelings will come especially during the school year that will say, "Don't get up this morning.  Don't cook, clean or do anything else." 

There is a time to take a break, but there are those times that one must fight through the feelings of "I don't want to..." and just do anyway.  Surfing the Internet for entertainment purposes is simply not important.  Watching TV, talking on the phone, shopping, visiting relatives, hanging out with neighbors and friends are all past-times, but they aren't significant when children need to be trained on basic things like cleaning up after themselves,  the house needs to be cleaned, trash needs to be taken out, clothes laundered, and meals cooked.  But sometimes a lazy spirit has a way of showing up and telling you that all things "fun, nice, and great" need your attention ASAP.  Don't be fooled!  That is how we mothers end up falling behind with preparing meals, doing chores, putting children to bed, paying bills, writing letters, answering emails, making business calls, etc.  Think of those times when you stayed on the phone far too long and every thing you had planned for that day ended up not being accomplished?  Procrastination got in the way of duties.   

Like children, husbands will need attention.  You may be too weary one day, then two, then three and so on to meet his needs.  But if you let too many days, weeks, and months go by, problems will occur in your relationship that will eventually affect your parenting skills and your children's behavior and performance in school.  Avoid the temptation to act like a lazy lover and do what you can to get some more energy even if it means cutting back on some of that after school hustle and bustle.  Remember give your man some lovin'! 

In closing, make the time for you when you can, but recognize the difference between a break and just being lazy.

Nicholl McGuire
See my parenting blog for families with mixed age groups http://parentsbabieschildren.blogspot.com

What Would You Do? Food Stamps Single Mother Of 4 Children

Back to school...

This summer seems so short--the end is coming upon us very quickly.  If you spent anytime in the Pittsburgh area, you may have noticed how unusually rainy this summer has been.  With many rainy days, there has been plenty of time to stay indoors and think about back to school and all that comes with it. 

Just when I sat back one day and finally had a moment to myself, I realized that school was starting very soon for one set of my boys and the other set would be starting later.  There was not enough time or money to get them everything they needed, all at the same time.  So here's what you do when you can't buy for every child right away...at least what I have found that has helped me over the years when buying items for back to school.

1.  You enlist the help of others (relatives, friends, and even people who enjoy celebrating birthdays).  When those who sincerely love you and your children, they will answer the call if you clearly state what it is that you need from them.  From babysitting to buying a pair of socks or putting a few dollars in your hand, let these people know what your concerns are and who knows what they might do whether a small gift or a large favor?

2.  Don't worry that you can't get all at the same time; instead note the things that are most needed and get them one child at a time.  Put off buying items for the children who you know can wait.  For instance, if Johnny needs shoes and Rayanne needs a backpack, look at which situation between the two needs immediate attention and which one can be put off until payday.

3.  Search Internet for "cheap..." and include what you need when you are on a tight budget.  Also, don't sleep on classified ads and flea markets/swap meets either.

4.  Ask for donations when you can't seem to make ends meet.  Visit a church, nonprofit organization, or discount store and tell manager about your needs.  Post fliers in public areas and online.  You can always offer a service in exchange for a product.

5.  Do set aside money for whatever cost the most and is very important to get right away.  Sometimes moms will put off what is most needed just to appease a child who is "being good" or will simply forget what is important and buy something else that isn't needed.  Put a reminder somewhere within eye contact so that you can see what it is that you need to be saving your money for and avoid distractions to keep you from getting the items.

6.  Lastly, seek sale, bargain, clearance, buy one, get one, and free shipping above all things!  Forget the regular price anything and if you can't use a coupon or get some break on or offline, even after shopping around, consider it a sign, hold off, you just might have a blessing right around the corner.

With all the things that you readers have to do, be sure that you are making quality time with children and preparing them for back to school issues that may arise with their peers, God bless!

Nicholl

Fighting The Pressures Of Motherhood « CBS Pittsburgh

When you have the opportunity to share your experiences good, bad and otherwise, you do it in such a way to help others see the light, escape their misery, and seek the peace they need to get through another day.  If you are a mother who is having some trouble parenting while maintaining a relationship, know that there are many like you who don't mind speaking the truth.  Seek out meetups in your area, counseling, church, and other resources that will help you solve your parental issues--do it, before it's too late!

Fighting The Pressures Of Motherhood « CBS Pittsburgh

When Mothers Cry Author Nicholl McGuire will be on KDKA Radio 1020 AM

Author/Poet Nicholl McGuire is currently visiting relatives and friends in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania.  She will be speaking on the radio about her book, When Mothers Cry, and this blog.  The live interview will air on the Chris Moore Show for one hour, Sunday, August 4, 2013 at 4:05 p.m.  Listeners and readers of this blog are encouraged to join in on the discussion. The call in number is 1-866-391-1020.