Why Mothers Cry
Frustrated veteran mothers, angry new mothers, resentful stepmothers, and other types of mothers can relate to a newly published book by Nicholl McGuire, "When Mothers Cry." Visit whenmotherscry.blogspot.com or amazon.com
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Football, Basketball, Soccer, Hockey--Don't Let it Take Over Your Home

Nowadays more and more women are sitting in front of the television along with the men watching the game. I tend to compare television sports to the soap operas I use to watch with my mother and grandmother as a child (especially WWE.)

Years ago, I remember the mood of the room changing when my relatives discovered that one of their soap opera characters was being attacked. Sometimes their negative attitude lingered away from the television screen for part of the day as a result. The child that was allowed to sit and watch soaps with them would then be told that she was "in the way...go play..." WOW! The impact of television! Mom would be in a bad mood and so would grandma. It was the same negative sometimes angry-filled emotions that I also had to cope with over the years after my mother watched her beloved Steelers lose a few too many games.

I recall many Sundays smelling a dinner consisting of: a great rump roast, peas, carrots, mashed potatoes, greens, cornbread, and homemade gravy along with a pound cake dessert or sweet potato pie slice. You would think with a great meal like that it was a pleasant, peaceful Sunday, right? Nope, not when the Steelers were playing. Mom was screaming, yelling and telling us children (my sister and I) to "be quiet the game was on!" and sometimes I did pray the team would win so she would be in a good mood. My dad wasn't as emotional and usually stayed away from all of us on Sundays because another work week would begin the next day. From age five until teen years, I witnessed my mom, who to this day is still a huge fan of the Steelers, scream at the TV about bad calls. She has had her share of VIP passes to watch the games, thanks to my Dad's former employer's connections.

So why am I bothered by the football, basketball seasons or any other sport seasons when it comes to the family? Because of the distractions and the negativity surrounding them. People drink during games (thank God my already hyper mother doesn't do that,) some cuss, fight, hit their women, spank their children more, and cry over games!

Just like the soaps, I know what I am about to say will ruffle a few readers' feathers, they are scripted. That's right I said scripted! You may say, "How do you know?" I would have to say, "Conduct your own research to prove that I'm wrong." Yes, there are genuine referee mistakes, serious injuries etc. But then there are also events that are created to get more people to tune in to certain games, picks, etc. ie.) Check out SuperBowl 2009 and you will learn that it was the most watched in television history, hmmm. Think about all of the events that led up to the Saints winning that game. Then think about all of the events that lead up to other cities winning the Superbowl. Think: There's a lot of money needed to run a city!

I read articles where event organizers are trying to figure out ways to get more women to watch sports on TV. If you know anything about sitting in a room with a group of women, they love drama! The marketers know what women like and they also know what men like so why not find a way to make the masses happy, right? If they can't get women to tune in, they sure know how to distract them. For example, why not put a series of Denzel Washington movies on several different cable stations like they did in Los Angeles not that long ago to keep women away from the men while the game was on.

If you ever watched a sports game on TV, you have seen the bad calls or heard your male relatives yell about them. They are referring to something unfair that happened on the field while the ref pretends as if he didn't see something or makes a call that never should have been made allowing the other "favored" team to catch up. With all the TV cameras watching the event, you would think the camera has final say with all of the calls, but it doesn't. I wouldn't be surprised to start seeing some tricks with the television replay. You thought you saw one thing, but once it is replayed (unless you have your VCR recording) you will see something totally different. It's coming, if it isn't already going on now. One's eyes clearly saw that a rule wasn't violated, yet the refs will call a foul anyway. Well, how do you think a bad call plays out in the real world in that little house or apartment in the small county of XYZ with the drunk uncle, angry spouse, or temperamental teen? There is arguing, fussing, bad moods all day, and a host of other negativity in the home just because of a d*mn game! A game that the average man will never play in! A game that doesn't help one spiritually, mentally or physically. A game that robs a father's time with his wife and his children. A game that upsets people for nothing more than the dollar bill! A game that has become a modern day idol! Then some wonder why God doesn't answer one's prayers.

Speed up to decades later and now I am a mother with sons who are passionate about the games they play in school. I am starting to see the same passion is carrying over onto some of those scripted sports games on the TV screen and yes I am concerned--very concerned. So I have been talking with dad about what we should say to the children when the team picked to win doesn't and how are we going to tone down the growing excitement for sports (scripted TV sports that is)?

I personally believe it's okay to watch some sports (that's right only select ones are watched by my children,) but what I don't believe is allowing sporting events or any events become an idol in one's household. How many banners, trophies, numbers, certificates, etc. does one have to display? I like what one father said about the numbers on the back of the young boys shirts. He said, "I would never let my son wear another man's number. I want him to wear his own numbers." I have personally witnessed and took a few physical assaults behind a temperamental viewer's obsession over a scripted game. Those orchestrated bad calls and behind the scenes sports betting may create more viewer interests, but the truth is there are families hurting because some just can't handle being hyped up about a certain team only for that team to suddenly have a great fall for no good reason!

I encourage you to do your own research on past games. Pick your favorite sports and you will see a pattern of foolish calls by refs. Interesting enough, during some of the most important games. You may have asked yourself, "What is going on?" while witnessing one unfair call after the other. But kept on allowing yourself to be mind controlled into believing that the team wasn't doing well, thanks to the announcers and your sports journalists.

Bad calls have happened so much over the years, that when you bring an argument like this to a sports fan, he or she just shrugs his or her shoulders as if no big deal. But when you say, "You know those games, some of those events are scripted." Watch the anger that grows in his or her eyes. The fan says, "Prove it." But the truth is, they can't handle the truth! Rather, when you show them the patterns of games in the past, the history of sports-betting, the tell-all books out there exposing the industry, and the commissioner, team owners and agents affiliations, they don't want to hear it. Unless you are one of the elite, even after researching, you still won't get the whole story, but you will at least get enough knowledge to make a determination whether it's even worth watching the game much less getting emotional about it.

In closing, if you are a mother who cares about her children, tell your children the truth and remind them that everyone can't be "The next great..."there is only so much space on the team. Rather, encourage your children to be the best they can in whatever their destined to become! Your child's talents can be found in this life by getting him or her involved in a little bit of this and that and not just sports!

Nicholl McGuire

Mom's Time Out!

Taking Time Out For Yourself

As women how many of you take time out of your day everyday for yourself? Statistics show very little actually do this small task that has huge benefits. So when this was proposed to me my immediate reaction was "I don't have time." Then I was asked "What do you think you need to do to take time for yourself?" This brought up some interesting ideas - massage, facials, pedicures, dancing, beach camping, friends... What we really are asking is do you take a "Timeout." Yes, just like the one we give our kids. Do you take time out for yourself everyday? I bet the answer is still no.

Something we need to realize is we need to recharge just as much as our kids need to. I don't know about you, but I'm not Super Mom, I need help with everything that goes on in my household. I also need to know when enough is enough. The dishes will be there in the morning as will the laundry. Tomorrow is another day to look forward to and finish the tasks that were not done the day before. Ultimately what is more important? Your sanity or the laundry?

Taking time out for yourself can be as simple as taking a bubble bath... that sounds like fun actually! Reading a favorite author you haven't read in a while, meditating, Floating in a swimming pool, Taking a steam bath, sauna, or jacuzzi, Taking a pleasant walk, Weekend getaway/break from the home, Listening to your favorite music, Girls night out, Evening meal at your favorite restaurant, Taking up a hobby, Finding a favorite leisure activity, Joining a club, Developing new interests. Anything in this list would benefit you and qualify for taking time for yourself.

Conscious vs. Unconscious. Reduction of the conscious mind (sympathetic nervous system) activity brought on by relaxation has the benefit of allowing the rest of the body to recharge it's self. Letting your subconscious mind (parasympathetic nervous system) bring us to a more peaceful state of being.

Affects On The Body. Strengthening the immune system, Slowing your heart rate, lowering blood pressure, slowing your breathing rate, reducing the need for oxygen, increasing blood flow to major muscles, reducing muscle tension, fewer heartaches and back pain, fewer emotional responses such as anger and fear, more energy, improved concentration, and a greater ability to handle problems in our lives. Sounds good, doesn't it!?

Practice, Practice, Practice... Use Techniques Regularly.
At first relaxation will feel foreign, but with daily practice you will begin to become aware of your own muscle tension and other physical sensations of stress. The goal is to know what the stress response feels like, and make a conscious effort to relax and to prevent stress from gaining control of your life. These are skills that over time will become automatic for you. Be patient with yourself, stay motivated, and reduce the negative impact that stress brings to your body!

My favorite leisure activity is reading, I love knowledge. What is your favorite leisure activity that takes time out for you?

Mendy Baker is a LifeStyle Trainer who uses a new proven program to build her organization and mentors others to do the same. Go to http://www.mendybaker.yolasite.com to get more information about LifeStyle Training. You can learn more about her and get your FREE 3 Steps To A Wealthy Mindset Workbook at http://www.MendyBaker.com

Things a New Mother Should Remember

Do you love your baby, but still feel overwhelmed as a new mom? Have you been wondering how a mom does all this? Here are some helpful tips to remember when you have the blessing of being a new mother.

You can enjoy your new bundle of joy and make every minute count, if you keep these important things in mind.

* Be easy on yourself! This is all new to you and you have to learn just like you learn to do anything else. You will get better as time passes.

* A city like "Rome wasn't built in a day". It took nine months of changes in your body to bring this beautiful baby into the world, and likewise, you will need time to get your body back in shape.

* Be patient and cease the moment. Take this special time to enjoy your baby. Your baby won't be little for long. Don't think everything has to be perfect in your world right now.

* You will evolve into a routine. This will not happen overnight and it will probably take at least six weeks to see any kind of schedule coming about.

* Do take the opportunity to rest when you can. If you have mild "blues" after the birth of your baby, one of the reasons could be you are not getting enough rest.

* Even the best mothers have days with challenges and disappointments. Just "flow with the tide" and "this too shall pass." You will learn as you go and in future days you will feel the sweet joy of success, as you see your understanding of what is expected increase and you master how to handle the demands.

* Arrange for help with the baby. If you do not have family close, let your spouse know and tell him you need help and/or ask a friend for help, even if just for a few hours so you can get rested.

* Reveal to family members, a friend, or someone that is concerned, how you're feeling. Sometimes we just need to talk and express ourselves and we feel better and can "pick ourselves up" and start anew. That person may have that positive comment or perspective you hadn't thought about. It helps to talk to a person that has been through the same experiences you are now going through.

Stay positive and commit yourself to being a successful mother. Remember, being a mom is a very important endeavor. Your dear baby is counting on you for their every need!

Brianna Gustin is a consultant to mothers who need uplifting ideas and perspective regarding their important role as a mother. She is a mother with many years of experience and common sense approaches to the every day challenges of motherhood and knows the sweet fruits of success in raising a large family. Brianna is the biological mother of a large family and has experienced many demands of being a mother and the combined pressures of being the wife of an executive.

If you feel overwhelmed at times and need a coach to offer uplifting ideas and counsel with a common sense approach, please send an email to momconsultant@gmail.com. I can set up a time to talk with you on the phone or have a chat session through email. This is a legitimate business, so please email only if you are interested in positive motherhood coaching. Reasonable counseling rates will apply.

Single Moms Dating - Getting Back Into the Dating Scene

Single moms often find it hard getting back into the dating scene. Dating when you have the responsibilities of children has a number of challenges: in addition to working all day, there is the transporting or arranging transportation for children's activities, supervising homework, household chores and shopping for groceries to name just a few of these. You probably wonder how or when you could actually have a date. Below are some ideas that may help you ease into dating again.

Think about what you are looking for in a date. An adult to spend time with may be all you are interested in at this time. You may want to go to a movie that doesn't have talking animals in it or simply meet occasionally for a cup of coffee in a place that doesn't serve a happy meal. All adults need the company of other adults. On the other hand you may want to find someone to form a long lasting relationship with. Whatever you want the next step will be to meet men you are compatible with. Unless you happen to work in a place filled with single men meeting available men may be difficult.

A very popular and safe way for single moms to meet single men is through online dating sites. In case you aren't familiar with these the process for using them is very simple: In the comfort of your home choose a site, write and post a profile that includes a recent photograph. In your profile include that you have children and tell something about them. But be sure to write enough about yourself to let prospects know that you are a woman as well as a mom.

Some men may be turned off by the fact you have children, but you probably wouldn't want to date them anyway. There are men out there who would love to find a great woman with children because they love family as much as you do. When browsing through male profiles look for those who are single dads or say that family is important to them.

Since your children and their safety are of prime importance online dating may be the perfect solution for your way to meet men. You will not meet a man in person until you know him very well. When you have a match or matches you will then begin what can become a lengthy period during which you get to know each other through emails. You may go through a number of these matches before you find the perfect one. But remember, this is all happening at your leisure from home. You don't have to provide for childcare or go through agonizing dinners with someone you can't wait to get away from.

When you are ready to meet for a real live date you will not have those first date jitters because you will already know so much about him.

There are numerous single men in your area who have posted personal ads on dating sites. They, like you, are looking for someone to connect with on some level-whether it be someone to have a cup of coffee with or one for a long term loving relationship.

By Abby P. Munroe

Being a single mom doesn't have to be the end of your social life. Single moms need to go out on dates to relax and unwind from their tiring role as a single parent. You need adult company and eating an occasional meal in a place that doesn't serve happy meals. Learn about Single Mom's dating Visit my site http://singlesmomsdating.com/