Asking Saves Kids - For the Love of God Talk to Your Kids

Join Nicholl on Chirbit - share audio

When I don't have the patience or time to write, I share my thoughts on Chirbit.  A simple way to get some thoughts off your mind.  Stop by the site browse the available audio.  Find something you like and just click.  Listen while you work or surf using any device.  Feel free to connect with me to receive the latest audio messages.  I am not only an author, wife and mother, but I encourage others online and offline.  Stay blessed!  Click Chirbit.

Nicholl McGuire

Nicholl with four sons in CA, 2015.

"A Slave Mother's Cry" Written By Rev. Timothy Flemming JR. & SR. - Remember the Slave Mother

One of the worst cries comes from a mother whose child has been kidnapped, taken without cause or died.  God have mercy!  It all is so painful, it stirs your spirit, when used correctly, pain makes you want to do more with your life, help others, do what's right!  Much of the motivation for blacks of the past to fight for change started with a slave mother's cry.  Know that truth!  If you have lost a child in any kind of way, redirect your pain and don't allow the enemy to win!  Stay true to your calling.  There will be brighter days whether in this life or the next one!  God bless. -- Nicholl McGuire 

The Ache in My Belly for My Grandmother and Others Who are Spiritual Moms

There is just something special about those wise, older moms who know how to pray and show those around them (no matter the skin tone, gender, sexuality, etc.) some love.  I miss my grandma.

I miss her because...

She was there to answer the phone during those times when my kids were getting on my last nerve.

She heard my cries even when I didn't call her and so she would pick up the phone and call me, "Are you okay?  Tell me about it."

She would remind me to take out the Bible and read a verse sometimes for her, other times for me.

She shared stories not only of her successes, but failures too.

She wasn't always happy and she didn't fake her emotions either or act as if she was better than me just because she was older and wiser.

She loved me even when I didn't love myself, God, and wasn't much on showing her love either.

She was genuinely happy when I achieved something and didn't mind listening to my stories.

She told me things and said, "This is just between me and you."  I felt special even if everyone else knew the same thing.

She didn't mind explaining how she whipped a meal or dessert together and sometimes mentioned her "secrets."

She laughed when I told her funny things and didn't act self-righteous.

I miss my Grandma.  I guess that is why it's hard sometimes writing my motherhood stuff on this blog now.  Feel free to check out When Mothers Cry and Tell Me Mother You're Sorry.

Nicholl McGuire

Your Husband, Boyfriend Won't Give You What Daddy Didn't

Seeking genuine love, affection, appreciation and more from a spouse or live-in companion can be self-defeating when he or she is unwilling or doesn't know how to do these things.  People just can't give you what they don't have nor can they satisfy innate desires especially when you have a history of "Daddy Issues."  Daddy didn't love mother and children, Daddy was too busy, Daddy had better things to do, Daddy was often frustrated and angry with us, Daddy had mental illness, Daddy's parents didn't love or care for him...and so all this stuff gets dumped on us somehow some way and we are encouraged to deal with it, "That's just how your father is." 

In my nonfiction book, Say Goodbye to Dad, written for those women and men who feel fatherless, and are seeking a deeper understanding as to how to break free from toxic emotional ties with their fathers, these topics and more are discussed.  I share some personal experiences, but the majority of the guide is directed toward presenting the struggles and finding the solace through the painful memories.

Life is simply too short to go about it wishing/hoping/praying for something that a partner, a father or a substitute just can't provide you, Mother.  The emotionally and physically draining one-sided relationship does impact you down to your very soul and then spills over onto children and grandchildren.  In Say Goodbye to Dad not only do I provide you with trusted research into various difficult personalities, but I expose the wounds and share tips on how to get on the fast track toward healing and come out of trials with a smile on your face!  There are enough issues one has to face in his or her own family let alone having to deal with Daddy related stuff as well when you don't have to or want to.

It is a damn good feeling to finally be free from fear, worry, and other toxic parental programming brought on by self and dysfunctional kinfolk--trust me, I have done it!  I want my readers to feel empowered, have courage and know that everything isn't going to fall apart because you are protecting yourself and your children from further emotional upset and other things connected to a dysfunctional father. 

You can parent better when you experience peace and no longer pain from the past.  You can also be a good partner to someone who loves you much or you can free yourself from a bad relationship decision as a result of a toxic tie to Dad. 

So check out a free sample of my nonfiction book, Say Goodbye to Dad  (use coupon code BP69U for a limited time only).  Now if your father isn't the issue, but your mother is a burden, then check out Tell Me Mother You're Sorry (use coupon code NK75A for a limited time only) that encourages self-awareness solutions on dealing with mother manipulation.

Nicholl McGuire, When Mothers Cry Blog Owner