Today my son asked, “is there anyone here, obviously not you, mom, who is
good at math?†Immediately, I took offense because we are in the middle of
a p...
Tuesday
Angry with an Abusive Partner, a Child Suffers
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Angry with Partner, a Child Suffers: A father didn't anticipate having a child with a woman he once loved, but now considers crazy. A mother cried many tears for failing t...
Thursday
Controlling Partners Don't Want Relatives and Friends Knowing Any Family Business
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Said Too Much, Did Too Little - The Abuser Will Ma...: Mean-spirited, vindictive, or thoughtless relatives and friends can add to the drama in a household comprised of victim, abuser and childre...
Tuesday
It's Never Good Enough...Mom Wants Everything to Be Perfect
From what she has selected for her loved ones to what she will be serving during the holidays, mom wants everything to be perfect! Described as organized, clean, practical, smart, and whatever nice name someone uses to describe the mother, she knows she has to live up to what they say or else experience ridicule. Well, if this describes you, relax Mom, everything won't be perfect not when flawed human beings are involved! You have done and will do your best and if anyone says anything, use your platform to speak truth, give them a life lesson they will never forget!
Holidays can be what you make them or choose not to make them. The older I get, the more I realize that tradition seriously is not that important, so I don't make them anymore. But what is significant is love any ole' time of the year! Can anyone feel the love when they are in a "I have to do everything right" kind of mom's presence or is the energy surrounding her being fueled by nothing more than a checklist, a routine, a requirement, or her own personal fantasy with characters to help her live it out?
The invites, personal stories and frustrations, gifts, decorations, and more that come with family traditions can be overwhelming. All "the stuff" will stifle loved ones from truly experiencing the love that is supposed to flow when in the presence of family and good friends. Yet, what usually happens is an undercurrent of negativity. Someone doesn't like one thing or another, someone else feels rejected, young children cry, while older ones sigh and moan, and others who should know better) have their share of "issues." Everyone expects someone to do something for them from help with meal preparation to cleaning up afterward while bank accounts are getting dangerously close to over-drafting and credit cards have long been declined.
"All the money I spent...the nerve of these kids...and he wonders why I told him I want a divorce...I can't stand his people and I really hate it when...! I wish people would help me...I did this, then I did that! Oh, they are so lazy!"
When does mom awake from what others told her she is supposed to be? When does she stop living someone else's dream and make life easier on herself and her finances? She is hosting, planning, creating, designing, organizing, buying, decorating, and doing other things for...? How does her partner and children really feel about all of her involvement in this thing and that one, does she even care how they feel while she craves for the attention and the flattering statements like, "You are such a good mom!"?
Tis' the season, when mothers cry.
Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on a variety of issues, here.
Holidays can be what you make them or choose not to make them. The older I get, the more I realize that tradition seriously is not that important, so I don't make them anymore. But what is significant is love any ole' time of the year! Can anyone feel the love when they are in a "I have to do everything right" kind of mom's presence or is the energy surrounding her being fueled by nothing more than a checklist, a routine, a requirement, or her own personal fantasy with characters to help her live it out?
The invites, personal stories and frustrations, gifts, decorations, and more that come with family traditions can be overwhelming. All "the stuff" will stifle loved ones from truly experiencing the love that is supposed to flow when in the presence of family and good friends. Yet, what usually happens is an undercurrent of negativity. Someone doesn't like one thing or another, someone else feels rejected, young children cry, while older ones sigh and moan, and others who should know better) have their share of "issues." Everyone expects someone to do something for them from help with meal preparation to cleaning up afterward while bank accounts are getting dangerously close to over-drafting and credit cards have long been declined.
"All the money I spent...the nerve of these kids...and he wonders why I told him I want a divorce...I can't stand his people and I really hate it when...! I wish people would help me...I did this, then I did that! Oh, they are so lazy!"
When does mom awake from what others told her she is supposed to be? When does she stop living someone else's dream and make life easier on herself and her finances? She is hosting, planning, creating, designing, organizing, buying, decorating, and doing other things for...? How does her partner and children really feel about all of her involvement in this thing and that one, does she even care how they feel while she craves for the attention and the flattering statements like, "You are such a good mom!"?
Tis' the season, when mothers cry.
Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on a variety of issues, here.
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When Mothers Cry by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on book by Nicholl McGuire, When Mothers Cry.
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